


These things take forever (I especially am slow)

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Artist Eren Yeager, Drunk Texting, Eren works at a pottery studio, Female Hange Zoë, Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin) Being An Asshole, Levi owns a tea shop, M/M, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-19
Updated: 2015-08-26
Packaged: 2018-04-05 03:07:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 25,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4163316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Listen you fuckwad," The man said, whipping around to face Eren. "I am in a shit mood, so you can shove whatever corporate bullshit you want to spew at me right up your little ass." He punctuated every foul word with a sharp jab to Eren's chest. "All I wanted was directions to my friends house so that I can attend his fucking engagement party, which I am already <em>late</em> for. And now thanks that that brat, not only will I show up late, I'll show up late and <em>shirtless</em>. "</p><p>An accident in the pottery painting studio where Eren works results in Levi losing his temper, as well as his shirt. Eren, in an attempt to be helpful, offers him a clean shirt. The two men slowly become friends...and maybe something more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In the doorway

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Work and chapter titles inspired, so far, by First Day of My Life, by Bright Eyes (ha)  
> Here's a link for the musically uneducated: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YvwdRyFgPw0  
> Also inspired by my own experience working at a pottery studio
> 
> First fic, so be nice thanks

-Eren-

Eren sighed and brought his arm up to wipe away the sweat that was currently dripping from his brow. The kiln room where he was working was warm enough to fry an egg, if he had a suitable rock to crack it open on. It always got this way during the summers, building on the already stuffy and humid air of the pottery studio where he worked. 

Very slowly, Eren leaned back over the kiln and pulled out a large ceramic vase, watching carefully as the bottom edge cleared the other pieces tucked around it. It was still warm from the heat of the kiln, but Eren was used to that, not bothering to put on gloves. They would have made his fingers sweat anyway. 

The vase was covered in messy streaks of red and blue paint, probably painted by a child. Father's day was coming up, after all. He set it down on a shelf next to him, eyes soft and mouth upturned in a gentle smile. Eren never got tired of seeing what people painted on their pottery. He liked the beautiful, intricate pieces that customers spent hours laboring over, but what he really loved were the kid's pieces. They were messy, but they were free- unhindered by expectations of skill or "correct" color choice. 

Eren had been working at the studio for a little over two years now- ever since he moved to Bellingham for college. It was a small but busy place with a staff of only five employees, all of whom were college students like him. It was only part time, but it kept his sister off his back and a bit of money in his pockets for food and rent. 

Just as he returned to the kiln to pull out another piece, an anxious voice called out from the front counter. "Eren? Can I get your help out here please?" 

It was Krista's voice. Eren frowned. Krista was hired several months after Eren, but had quickly taken to the job. She was an expert at handling even the most frustrating customers, able to keep a sweet smile on her face long after Eren would have started banging heads together. Eren had never been known for his patience. For her to ask for his help instead of calling for Sahsa meant it probably wasn't an issue of having too many customers to handle- maybe she actually needed him to knock sense into someone for once. 

He sighed again, running his fingers through sweat-dampened, unruly hair, and emerged from the heat of the kiln room. 

 

-Levi-

This was supposed to be an easy, straightforward kind of day. The kind of day that slipped into the next one and right out of memory. Instead, it had been one disaster after another. 

Levi had pulled himself out of bed that morning only to discover that his building's hot water heater had broken sometime during the night. After enduring an ice cold shower and yelling at the water company over the phone for more than an hour, he realized he was behind schedule, and had to throw his bags into the car and take off without even a cup of his favorite Earl Grey tea. And then, as if that hadn't been bad enough, the asshole border patrol officer had taken offense at something Levi had insinuated - it was a rather genius line that compared the man's unfortunate face to taking long shits. Levi would have been proud of his own cleverness, but then the officer insisted on searching his car as punishment. Finally, (finally!) Levi made it to Bellingham. 

And then, of course, he got lost. 

It wasn't like he didn't know where he was going. Of course he did. He'd even been there before. But his friend's place was tucked away in the forest somewhere and all unfamiliar forests look basically the same, and Bellingham's streets were really fucking confusing, all tangled up and curly like someone had just let a bratty child doodle on the map for a bit and built the roads to follow. So when he finally happened upon a cutesy little commercial area for the third time, he pulled in to a parking spot and reluctantly stepped into the closest building to ask for directions. Which is, predictably, the moment when everything went well and truly to shit. 

Levi had only just stepped through the doorway when a small torpedo of life and energy barreled straight into him. Levi dimly heard a _crash_ as something fell to the ground, but he was falling too, arms swinging as if they could somehow still correct his balance. He landed on his side with a sharp cry- pain was shooting through his hip and his elbow like lightning. When he recovered enough to look around, he took in little boy sitting on the ground beside him and the scattered pieces of pottery shards before glancing down at himself. "You little shit." he hissed, narrowing his eyes at the brat. 

His best shirt was now covered in cheerful yellow paint. 

 

-Eren- 

The sight that greeted him as he left the back room was enough to stop Eren in his tracks. 

A small boy sat sobbing on the wooden studio floors, surrounded by what Eren could only assume were the remains of his pottery piece. An older woman, (his grandmother, perhaps?) was kneeling next to the boy and speaking in a soothing voice while glaring up at a short, well dressed man with dark hair styled in an undercut. Eren would have thought him attractive except that he was clearly the culprit in this fiasco. 

The man was letting out a string of angry curses, mostly directed at the small boy in front of him, as he attempted to scrub paint off of his white button-down. Krista, obviously uncertain about where she should even start with this one, was hovering nearby and attempting to calm down a few customers who were shocked by hearing such foul language in a family establishment. 

"Excuse me. Sir," Eren said firmly as he approached the man, "I'm going to have to ask you to leave." 

"Fuck you," the man snarled back, still scrubbing at his shirt.

"Sir, I-"

"Listen you fuckwad," The man said, whipping around to face Eren. "I am in a shit mood, so you can shove whatever corporate bullshit you want to spew at me right up your little ass." He punctuated every foul word with a sharp jab to Eren's chest. "All I wanted was directions to my friends house so that I can attend his fucking engagement party, which I am already _late_ for. And now thanks that that brat, not only will I show up late, I'll show up late and _shirtless._ " 

Eren couldn't help it. This angry, short, inappropriate man- who was way too good looking for his own good, despite his disheveled hair and the yellow paint splattered over his chest- this man was planning on going to an engagement party shirtless and that was way too funny for Eren to handle soundlessly. While the other customers, Krista, and a disgruntled (but very attractive) man in front of him looked on, baffled, Eren dissolved into uncontrollable laughter. 

When Eren's laughter finally died down, the tension in the room had ebbed away. He drew in a shuddering breath and looked down to meet narrowed grey eyes. "I haven't.. heh.. I haven't laughed that hard since... since Jean got stuck in the dumpster freshman year!" 

"Glad to provide some amusement," the man said bitterly, but Eren thought the look in his eyes was not quite so harsh as before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for making it through, you guys! Please leave whatever comments/kudos you think I deserve.


	2. I don't know where I am

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to wait a little longer to post this but I just can't anymore! Besides, I've already got chapter 3 basically written, as well as the beginning of chapter 4 and most of chapter 5 done (what can I say, I write in circles), so I don't really know what I'm waiting for at this point. Enjoy. :)

-Eren-

"Look," Eren said, after the pottery shards had been swept up and the boy and his grandmother had been sent off with a gift card for their troubles, "I'm off in twenty minutes. My place is really close, you can borrow one of my shirts and throw yours in the wash if you want." 

Eren wasn't sure why he was offering, except that he knew a thing or two about bad days, and there was something about this man that fascinated him. Maybe it was his long slender fingers and the way they twitched over drying yellow paint smears. Maybe it was the relief (and also guilt?) in his eyes when Eren made it clear he wouldn't ask the man to pay for the broken pottery. 

For a moment, it seemed as if the man might turn him down, but in the process of adjusting the collar of his shirt, a hand brushed against a stiff patch of yellow paint. Eren watched as pale fingers curled into a fist, and then forcibly relaxed. 

"You'll just make me late," the man muttered. 

Eren rolled his eyes, exasperated. "You're already late, you said. Being later won't change much."

"Tch," he scoffed, "You don't know my friends, brat."

"Maybe not, but I have a feeling you would rather show up late and clean than on time and covered in yellow paint. Or shirtless." Though Eren thought he wouldn't mind seeing it if he did. The man just crossed his arms despite his stiff, paint encrusted shirt, and gave Eren a look that suggested he would be quite capable of bashing his head in if he so desired. Eren was too busy looking at the definition of the man's muscles through the white fabric to notice.

But the man sighed finally and asked, "Where should I wait?"

 

-Levi-

The coffee shop that the boy had pointed him towards- literally, since it was across the street- was small and dark. There was only one other customer, sitting in an armchair by several bookshelves. At the front counter a lanky boy with two-toned hair and a black apron leaned with one elbow propped up on the counter, bored. When he noticed Levi walk through the front door his eyes widened, and he turned to shout into the back, "Armin, come out we've got someone!"

A thin voice answered from the back "I'm making scones, Jean, do it by yourself!" and Jean's panicked expression would have made Levi smirk if he wasn't covered in yellow paint and late for Erwin's party. He wondered if this was the Jean that got stuck in a dumpster. _How does someone get stuck in a dumpster anyway?_

"Shit." the boy muttered, but he turned toward Levi with a fake smile and asked "What can I get you, sir?"

"Tea."

"Uhh, okay," Jean said, running a hand through his (probably filthy) hair before scrambling to find the tea, "We've got, uh... Oolong, Lapsang Sou-something, Sencha, and Earl Grey?"

"Souchong," Levi corrected, but Jean just looked at him blankly. "It's called Lapsang Souchong."

"Oh." Jean frowned down at the tea in his hands. "Is that the one you want?"

"No, you idiot. I want the Earl Grey." He scowled up at the menu, then added, "16 ounce."

Jean's eyes narrowed at being called an idiot but he restrained himself and began to ring up Levi's order, brows furrowed as he slowly and uncertainly punched each button.

"Today would be nice," Levi commented sarcastically, and this time Jean wasn't able to restrain himself. 

"Now listen, you ass-"

"JEAN!" A voice interrupted, and soon a short boy with blonde hair tied into a ponytail emerged from the back. He was wearing a black apron like Jean's, but it was covered in white dust that could only be flour. _Scone boy,_ Levi thought. "Jean, why don't you go start his order while I ring it up," the blonde commanded. Jean began to slink away. 

"Wash your hands first!" Levi called after him, and was rewarded with a glimpse of the boy's middle finger.

 

-Eren-

When Eren emerged from the building at the end of his shift, the dark haired man was already waiting. He had a paper coffee cup in his hand from the cafe across the street. Eren walked past him and began to unlock his bike. 

"I live just a few blocks down Harris Ave," he said, and waved a hand in that direction. "Usually I just walk here for work but I was planning on taking a ride down Chuckanut Drive later." The man grunted in response, though Eren doubted he had any idea where Chuckanut Drive was or why anyone would want to see it. "Anyway, I can bike home and you can follow in your car." 

They did just that. Thankfully there was very little traffic, and with the sun shining down on him and the wind in his hair, Eren could almost forget that he was being tailed by a short (and short-tempered) man who would very soon be wearing one of his shirts to an engagement party. 

Eren lived in a boxy apartment building with his best friend, Armin. It was close enough to the school and both of their jobs, and as a bonus was just down the road from the best hole-in-the-wall teriyaki joint in Bellingham. He and Armin had been living there ever since they moved out of the dorms at the end of freshman year. It wasn't the nicest place, but they made it their own. Eren had found an old but serviceable couch at a yard sale, Armin had a few band and movie posters, and Eren's sister Mikasa had insisted on buying them a small TV as a move-in present, so they did well enough, really. 

So it wasn't until he unlocked the door and let this stranger in that he realized what a shitty apartment he had. 

"I, uh- well. Sorry its so messy, let me just-" He frantically began to pick up the few dishes sitting on their coffee table and counter, shoving them into the already cluttered sink. "My roommate is still at work, usually we're cleaner but we were both running late this morning and-" 

The older man sighed and just waved a hand. "Stop. I don't need to know what your grubby little place looks like normally. I just need a shirt. Preferably one that is cleaner than your sink." 

"Oh! Yeah, I've got one!" Eren motioned for the other man to stay put and walked off to his room. If the man had thought the living room was bad, he _definitely_ didn't want to see Eren's room. There were a few more dishes stacked on the desk, a towel thrown over his chair, and heaps of clothes scattered all over the floor. Thankfully, the shirt Eren was looking for wasn't in one of the piles. It was hanging in the back of Eren's closest, undisturbed for as long as he had lived at the apartment. 

He pulled the shirt out, inspecting it carefully for stains. Satisfied that there were none, he walked back out to the living room, where the man was glaring at Eren's kitchen. 

"Here," Eren said, handing the shirt to him. "I wore it once for my high school graduation and then never again. It'll probably fit you better than me at this point actually, I've grown since then."

With a nod, Levi stripped out of his shirt _(don't be creepy Eren, don't be creepy)_ and pulled Eren's off of the hanger. Eren couldn't resist the urge to stare. The man in front of him was _beautiful._ The muscles in his arms flexed as he unbuttoned Eren's shirt and slipped it on, and Eren could see his perfect, defined abs and unmarked skin. 

"I, uhh.. my name's Eren," he blurted out when the man in front of him had finished buttoning up the shirt. It did fit him well, just as Eren had thought.

"Tch. Levi."

"Um, great! Okay then, I guess that's it, you can keep the shirt, really, it fits you better than me anyway," Eren rambled. He could feel himself blushing. Thank god for tan skin, it probably wasn't even visible. "I know I offered to wash yours but then you'll just have to pick it up later so you probably don't want to do that and anyway you have a party to go to and-"

"Brat, shut up," Levi interrupted suddenly.

Startled, Eren met his grey eyes. "Huh?"

Levi sighed. "I still don't know where the fuck I am."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Older, mature, long-haired Armin is my weakness. Uuuugh the fanart where he's commander? That stuff kills me.  
> Also, this scene with Levi and newbie barista Jean has been my favorite to write so far.  
> Please leave love and comments!


	3. Don't know where I've been

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just got back from a small vacation to Portland and DAMN it is hot there, at least for my rain-and-gloom loving Washington self. Stay cool everybody! Have a chapter.

-Levi-

Despite the filth of his apartment, the kid's shirt wasn't too bad. Maybe a little long in the sleeves, but Levi supposed he could roll them up. He might even do it just to tease the poor boy- _Eren_ , Levi reminded himself. Eren seemed to have some strange fascination with Levi's arms. Levi had noticed him starting more than a few times already. It was flattering, he supposed, and really the brat wasn't too bad looking himself. 

As soon as Eren understood the situation, he volunteered to help. They finally agreed that Eren would ride in Levi's car and guide him to Erwin's house, then continue on the bike ride that he had planned ("Your friend's house is on the way, actually!"), though Levi insisted on wrapping Eren's bike in a clean sheet before it came anywhere close to the car. With a fair amount of cursing on both their parts, they managed to maneuver it into the back seat, and Levi and Eren finally got on the road. 

Eren was a good navigator, giving directions in a clear and confident voice as he watched the moving dot on his phone. "Okay, keep going here for a while, we'll pass the middle school in a bit... you're looking for a right turn on Willow road."

Levi grunted and they fell into silence for a moment. 

"So... Whose engagement is it?" Eren asked. Levi glanced over but the boy was still staring down at his phone.

"Why the fuck does it matter to you?"

Eren shrugged. "It doesn't I guess. Just curious."

Levi let out an irritated huff of air, but then, without really meaning to, he began to speak. "It's my best friend Erwin and his partner Mike. They met in the military. Well, thats where I met Erwin, actually." He huffed in annoyance. "That asshole is going to kill me for being so late."

"You were in the military?" When Levi looked over this time, Eren's bright eyes were staring back at him. They were a swirl of blue and green that seemed to change as the dappled afternoon light danced across them.

"Is that so surprising?" 

Eren's gaze broke away to turn back to the road. "Well, no. I guess not. Oh, there's Willow, turn here." 

Levi turned, trying not to wonder what color Eren's eyes really were. 

"My sister- Mikasa- she thought about joining up."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. She works at a Judo dojo in Seattle now though."

The car was quiet for the rest of the ride except for Eren's directions, and soon they were on a street that Levi recognized. Tall pine trees towered over beautiful homes with well-tended gardens and shiny cars parked out front. 

He pulled into a wide driveway behind Erwin's green Jeep Commander before Eren could announce that they were there. It was a two story grey house with white trim and a manicured lawn. There were a few white ribbons and balloons haphazardly tied to the porch. Levi snorted. Probably Hanji's work. She was always far too excited about these things. 

 

-Eren-

Levi had made his friends out to be just as contentious as he was, but to Eren it seemed that they weren't terribly upset that he was late. Just as both men hopped out of the car and prepared to pull Eren's bike out of the backseat, a screeching voice called from the doorway. 

"Leeeeevi!" A woman sprinted toward them, her messy ponytail flying behind her. When she reached them she pulled Levi into a hug that looked more like one of Mikasa's neck locks, arms tight around the shorter man's neck. "Leeeevi, we were just making bets about how much later you would be! You should have been here ten minutes ago, now I owe Erwin twenty dollars!!" 

Eren snickered from the other side of the car, and the woman gasped as she finally noticed him. She released Levi, who grimaced and rubbed his neck.

"Levi!" she said, "Why didn't you tell me you were bringing a boy over!? And what a cutie too!" She bounded over and began to inspect Eren. "Look at those eyes! No wonder Levi noticed you," she said conspiratorially, "he's always had a thing for boys with pretty eyes."

Eren finally understood. "Oh, n-no, we're not-" he said, just as Levi growled "Hanji." Eren frantically shook his head.

 _She thinks I'm Levi's boyfriend?_ Eren thought, waving his hands in a gesture that was supposed to indicate just how impossible the idea was. _Levi may be seriously attractive, but that doesn't change the fact that he's a total asshole._

"Oh," Hanji said, looking back and forth between the two of them as she whined, "Are you sure?" 

"YES." Levi answered firmly, beginning to shove Hanji back towards the front of the house. "He was my guide over here. He's just leaving." 

"Levi! Shame on you! You can't bring someone to a party and then ask them to leave!" Hanji turned to glare down at Levi and put her hands on her hips. "at _least_ invite him in for a drink."

"The brat's probably too young to drink." Levi muttered, but Hanji continued to stare down at him. "Fine! Fine. Come in if you want." He started walking towards the wall, leaving Eren to fend off Hanji on his own. 

"Oh, it's okay, I don't need to come in," Eren said, holding up his hands in protest, "I really was only here to give directions."

"Well if you know Levi, you're invited. Come on!" Hanji captured his wrist in a vice grip and started _pulling_ him toward the house.

"I only met him this morning..." Eren said weakly, but he gave up on resisting and followed Hanji toward the house.

Eren thought he caught a glimmer of something dangerous and calculating in Hanji's eyes, but it was gone before he could be sure.

"Levi!" a tall man said as they walked through the door, "it's been a while!" He was blonde, muscular, and had a decisive jaw that made him extremely handsome, despite two very bushy eyebrows. Behind him, guests milled around the living room dressed in sports jackets and tea-length dresses. Eren frowned down at his own outfit, a ratty green tee shirt and dark wash jeans; he felt distinctly out of place. 

The blonde man strode over to where they stood at the door and pulled Levi into a quick embrace. Levi grimaced. "Erwin," he awknowledged.

"Of course," the man continued, "It wouldn't have been nearly so long if-"

"If I wasn't two hours late, I know, I know." Levi interrupted, irritated.

Erwin looked down at his friend with an amused expression, "I was going to say, if you bothered to visit every once in a while." The words were reproachful but his voice was soft, and by the way Levi's shoulders slumped in silent admission, Eren could tell that the two men genuinely cared about each other. 

 

-Levi-

He probably shouldn't have let Hanji bully him into allowing the brat inside. Almost as soon as the three of them had made it past the front door, she was dragging the boy around and introducing him to all of their friends as: "Levi's guide, isn't he cute!?" Levi glared at her, but she just waved back cheerfully. The kid looked a little overwhelmed but he went along with it, probably realizing that resisting Hanji was futile. 

"So where is that future husband of yours anyway?" Levi asked the man standing next to him. He couldn't see Mike anywhere. "Isn't it impolite to hold an engagement party without both of the future spouses present?"

Erwin laughed. "Why, Levi, I might be tricked into believing you care! I thought you didn't approve of Mike."

"I never said I didn't approve of Mike. I said I didn't like him sniffing at me."

Erwin shook his head in disbelief but answered, "He's out back." 

Mike was indeed outside, standing over a grill and wearing a white apron with loopy black writing that read "Kiss the Cook". As soon as they were close enough Erwin obliged, leaning in to press his lips to Mike's and snaking one hand around his waist. 

Levi rolled his eyes, but he couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy at their easy intimacy. 

Mike, another tall but much scruffier blonde, gave his fiance a fond smile, then turned to greet Levi.

"Levi," he said to the shorter man, "glad you could make it."

Levi knew that this was the only comment he would receive from Mike about his lateness, and he was glad of it. Mike had always been the reticent sort, sparing only as many words as were necessary to get his point across.

\---

Levi was reaching the bottom of his beer when Eren and Hanji joined the group outside. 

"Mike! Erwin! There you are!" Hanji cried delightedly. "Eren, come meet Mike!"

"Professor Zacharius?" 

Hanji and Levi both stared at Eren in confusion. Erwin only chuckled.

"Hello Eren," Mike said, as if it were no surprise to see a student at his engagement party. He barely even looked up from the grill. 

"You already know each other?" Hanji seemed more than a little disappointed to miss out on their introduction. 

"I took an Anthropology course with Professor Zacharius fall quarter," Eren said.

"I'm Mike, here." the man corrected as he flipped a cooked burger onto the waiting plate. Eren nodded in acknowledgement. 

"Are you interested in studying Anthropology, Eren?" Erwin asked. 

"No.. not really. I mean-" he said hastily, glancing at Mike, "I liked the class! But what I'm actually interested in is Art." 

"Ah," Erwin said, "that's a difficult path."

"Yeah, my sister keeps nagging me about it too," Eren admitted, "She wants me to do something practical. I know it'll be hard. Most artists don't really become famous until after they die. But as long as I sell enough of my art to get by I know I'll be happy enough." 

"What if you don't sell enough?" Hanji asked curiously

Eren grimaced. "Live on friend's couches, I guess. I'll find a way"

"Tch. Good luck with that, brat." Levi scoffed, taking another sip of his drink.

"Are you saying you don't think I can do it?" Eren demanded.

"I'm saying that a kid who hasn't lived a hard day in his life is in for a rude awakening when no one wants his shitty little finger paintings." Levi knew the words were a mistake as soon as they left his mouth, but it was too late to take them back. 

He saw Eren's expression harden. "You know nothing about me, Levi," the boy retorted furiously. Behind him, Hanji and Erwin shared a look that Levi couldn't identify.

Too frustrated by his own stupidity, Levi could only stare back at the younger man. Maybe if he didn't say anything else, the brat would cool down. Instead, his lack of response seemed to infuriate the boy even more, who growled wordlessly and stalked off into the house.

Hanji moaned. "Levi, you _idiot_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What an asshole!  
> Don't worry though, next chapter will bring some sads but also some awwws


	4. So I thought I'd let you know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has been the hardest chapter to write so far, and I still don't really like how it turned out. Heart-to-hearts are hard, guys! Also, length is hard. On the bright side, the next two chapters are much, much better, and quite a bit longer, and I'm excited to share them with you soon!

-Levi-

"Eren?" Levi tapped on the bathroom door with a knuckle. There was no response from inside, but the light was on, and Eren was nowhere else in the house. Levi hesitated, hand hovering over the knob, but then tried it anyway. To his surprise, it opened, and Levi found Eren sitting on the toilet cover and staring out the window. The last of the evening light was turning the sky outside a pale purple, and Levi could hear sounds of the party drifting up from the backyard. Neither moved for a long moment as Levi took in the scene. Finally, Levi came to a decision and quickly turned, shut the door, and locked it. He approached Eren and then hovered for a moment as he decided where to sit.

"Tch. Couldn't you have chosen a cleaner room to have a breakdown in?" 

"So sorry to inconvenience you." Eren said bitterly, but his eyes didn't leave the window. 

Levi grabbed a clean towel from the nearby cupboard and used it to cover the edge of the tub across from Eren's toilet. It was a narrow bathroom, so when he sat their knees were almost touching.

"Eren." Levi reached out as if to touch Eren's knee with the tips of his fingers, but thought better of it and quickly withdrew his hand. He took in a long breath, then said, "I'm an insensitive asshole." he paused, then admitted, "Hanji told me to start with that."

Eren snorted. "Hanji's right." 

The two men were silent for a while as Levi contemplated the white bathroom tiles beneath his feet. They were made to imitate marble, with veins of blue running haphazardly throughout each square. Levi idly wondered who had chosen the tiles. Was it Erwin, or Mike? Or, had it been chosen by some previous inhabitant of the house who moved away but left fake marble tiles behind?

Finally Eren took in a breath as if to speak, his eyes briefly leaving the window to glance at Levi. It was Levi who spoke first though, letting words tumble out of his mouth in a rush as their eyes met. "For my mother it was singing," he said. 

"What?" 

"Singing," he repeated, and looked away. "She spent her entire life trying to make it as the lead singer of some shit band and in the end it killed her." 

"How?" Eren's voice was soft. 

"Things started out well, before I was born and for a while after- she still had friends then, and living on couches wasn't so bad. But over the years the couches got worse and the 'friends' we stayed with seemed less and less friendly. She died of a heroin overdose when I was six."

Eren grimaced. Levi was thankful that the boy didn't try to apologize or make it better; he just took it in and waited for the rest of the story.

"By then she was so drugged up on heroin that she would forget to feed me," Levi said bitterly. "I would have died along with her, but my uncle found me first." Those years, after his mother's death, had been the worst of his life. It wasn't something that Levi like to talk about. In fact, the only two who knew his history were Erwin and Hanji, though he suspected Erwin had passed on some information to Mike. 

When Eren spoke again is was with a fierce determination. "I won't let that happen to me."

Levi nodded. For the moment, that would have to be enough.

 

-Eren-

Eren was used to people being skeptical about his dream to be an artist. He was used to uneasy smiles and fake platitudes as they wished him good luck and then quietly whispered to one another that he'd end up at a desk job someday. Those people always left an uneasy feeling in his gut, but never before had someone called him out on his fears as easily as Levi had. And as much as he hated to admit it, Eren was afraid. Afraid that no one would like his work, that no one would buy it, that he would have to find other jobs to fill in the gaps. So at first he was furious when Levi pointed those things out to him in one biting sentence. 

Now though, with Levi sitting in front of him, apologizing without ever saying "I'm sorry", Eren understood that Levi didn't mean to hurt him. Levi _cared_ , despite the fact that the two men had met only hours before. And he had shared something deeply personal with Eren- something he suspected most people weren't aware of. Eren could respect that. In fact-

"While we're sharing origin stories..." he started with a nervous laugh.

"Hmm?" Levi had been staring at the bathroom tiles again, but he looked up as soon as Eren spoke.

"You were wrong earlier. I've lived more than a few hard days." Eren looked down to his lap- he had involuntarily clenched both hands into fists. "My adopted sister and I have been on our own since were about fifteen years old."

Levi only stared back, silent, as Eren explained.

"My parents took Mikasa in just before I started 5th grade. Some pretty terrible stuff happened to her- I shouldn't share any of it without her permission, but basically she lived through a lot, even before everything happened. So my parents adopted her and things were great for a few years. But then...then my mom died." 

Eren took a shaky breath and, with some surprise, felt Levi reach forward and put a hand on his knee. It was clearly an unfamiliar experience for the older man- his arm was a little too stiff, his fingers held a little too straight. But once again Eren was filled with the overwhelming feeling that Levi _cared_.

"After her death my father got progressively more distant and angry. He would shut himself in his room for days, or leave the house and come back drunk and crying as the sun rose. And then one day he just disappeared. 

"For a while we thought he would show up again, so Mikasa and I didn't tell anyone that he was gone. He left a couple credit cards and some cash behind, so we used that until we couldn't anymore. When we realized he wasn't coming back Mikasa got a job by lying about her age, and I got one a few months later.

"After we figured the money out, it was almost too easy to trick everyone. I'm sure some people thought it was strange that they never saw our father, but it was easier for them to just assume that he worked a lot than to think that we were on our own." Eren fell silent, and the two men sat in the fading light for a while longer. 

They were connected only by one pale arm, which had finally relaxed into an almost natural touch. 

 

-Levi-

"This was a fun night, actually," Eren said, holding the handles of his bike as he and Levi stood in Erwin's driveway. "Despite everything."

Levi snorted. "Kid, you don't know what fun means." 

"No, really!" Eren insisted. "I enjoyed... getting to know you." He pullled his eyes away from Levi and pretended to fiddle with the headlights on his bike. Levi couldn't see the color of his eyes in the early nighttime anyway, but it still felt like a loss.

"Get out of here." Levi said, gruffly. Eren nodded and swung a leg over his bike. Levi could see the corners of his mouth twitch like he was trying to hold back a frown. 

The name came out of his mouth involuntarily. "Eren." the boy turned to look back at him, startled. 

Levi hesitated, then said,"..me too." Eren's answering grin and wave as he peeled out of the driveway were enough to make Levi's heart skip a beat. 

When he walked back into the house, Erwin looked at him curiously. "Levi... are you all right?"

"Yes." Levi felt more than all right.

Hanji peered down at him as well. "Erwin. Is my eyesight going or...?"

"No," The man said slowly, "I see it too."

"Would you two stop babbling and let me through? I'm going to bed. I'm tired of looking at your shitty faces." Levi couldn't quite muster up the irritation the words required, but his two friends let him through anyway, staring after him with confused expressions. 

That night, curled up in Erwin's guest bed, Levi's sleep was full of dreams about green-blue eyes and the feel of denim beneath his fingertips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hint: Levi was totally smiling in that way he does where he isn't smiling at all but he's also not scowling so you know hes actually really happy


	5. With these things there's no telling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew, I did it! This chapter was a bit of a beast. It's done now though, so enjoy!

-Eren-

Just two weeks after the engagement party, Eren was working on a busy Saturday when a toddler peed on his high chair.

Eren didn't work the studio floor very often, preferring instead to load and unload kilns in the relative safety of the back room. But Ymir had been assigned that shift for the day, and on days like this the studio needed every hand they could get. Marco and Sasha were working too, but Marco was patiently showing a group of customers how to use the stencils correctly and Sasha was on her break, so that only left Eren at the counter. Eren had shit luck.

"You know how young children are!" the boy's mother said, offering Eren the high chair, "He just can't seem to hold it in!" The woman had wiped down the plastic with a paper towel, but it still let off the distinctive odor of urine. Eren sighed and pulled on a pair of gloves before accepting the chair from the woman, and then pulled out a bottle of disinfecting spray to clean it with.

This, predictably, was when he heard a familiar voice screeching his name from the front door.

"EREN!" Hanji cried, and Eren turned to see her and Erwin entering the studio, followed by a furious Levi.

"Hanji," Eren said, conscious of the fact that he was still holding a pee-soaked piece of plastic in his left hand. "Um. What are you doing here?" _please don't be here to paint, please don't be here to paint_ , he prayed silently, but it was no use.

"We're here to paint of course!" Hanji chirped, coming to a stop in front of the counter where Eren stood. _shit._

Behind her, Erwin seemed amused. Levi, however, was glaring at Hanji with his arms crossed. "I don't paint," Levi growled. "Besides, the last time I was here my favorite shirt was ruined by some little shit and I got asked to leave. And now you want me to spend time here voluntarily."

Hanji shrugged off his protests. "I bet you'll enjoy it more than you think, Levi! And besides, Eren is here! He can help us with everything, right Eren?"

"Yes. Right. Of course."

And then, Eren felt Levi's gaze finally land on him. He felt the distinct moment when Levi noticed the high chair in one gloved hand and disinfectant in the other, watched the man's nostrils widen imperceptibly as he noticed the smell wafting off of the chair.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me."

 

-Levi-

Levi seethed quietly. He sat at a wooden table in the pottery studio with Erwin and Hanji, who were both trying, somewhat unsuccessfully, to paint their ceramic pottery. Hanji had dropped a small plate onto the table in front of Levi's crossed arms, but so far he hadn't moved to touch it.

Levi knew coming here had been a terrible idea.

He had driven down from Vancouver again, this time uneventfully, because Hanji had promised a fun day out with Erwin _"Before he is lost to us forever."_ , in her words. Leave it to her to come up with painting as a fun outing.

_"But Leeeeeevi!" Hanji pleaded, trying to trap him in one of her dangerously tight hugs, "Eren told us all about it at the party and Erwin and I think it will be fun!"_

_"It will be messy and dirty and loud, and I'm not interested," Levi said, dodging her embrace._

_"Fine," she pouted. "We'll just go to the zoo instead."_

_"Oh FUCK no. Do you know how filthy those places are?"_

_"It's either that or painting!"_

_"Fine! Fine. You two can paint, and I'll come with you. But don't expect me to touch anything in that place."_

_"Are you suuuuureee about that?" Hanji sang, "Eren might be there!"  
_

And indeed, Eren was there. And _fuck_ if Levi didn't want to touch him.

While stubbornly refusing to paint the plate set out by Hanji, Levi had let his eyes wander around the studio. There were hordes of children and adults there, all under the same delusion as Hanji that painting pottery was a good way to spend a Saturday afternoon. In the middle of all of it was Eren.

At any given moment, Eren seemed to be completely aware of everything that was going on in the studio. He moved effortlessly from one customer to another, handing out paintbrushes, giving suggestions, even helping a frazzled-looking young mother put her son's hand-prints on a large mug. He seemed to know what customers were looking for before they even had a chance to ask for it. Levi watched in growing amazement while Hanji and Erwin chattered beside him. They were discussing wedding colors, so Levi had no compunction about tuning them out.

Across the studio, Eren was showing a customer how to do something complicated-looking (to Levi, at least) with paint and yarn. The table was slightly tilted though, and Levi watched as - for the third time - the ball of yarn rolled off the table and onto the floor. Once again, it rolled away from where Levi was sitting, and he was rewarded with a perfect view of Eren's... assets.

"Levi! Levi, aren't you listening?" Hanji's voice finally broke him out of his thoughts.

Levi turned to glare at Hanji. "What." he asked flatly. Anything that did not include staring at Eren's _very fine_ ass did not interest him at the moment.

Hanji smirked. "See something you like?" she asked.

"The only thing I'll ever like about this place is leaving it," Levi said bitingly, but his eyes slid back over to Eren. He had straightened up again, unfortunately.

"Ha!" she said, following his gaze. "Pay up, Erwin!" Hanji cried, holding a hand out across the table to Erwin, "I _told you_ he had a crush!" The blonde man laughed and pulled a leather wallet out of his back pocket, thumbed through, and passed a crisp twenty to the gleeful woman.

"Don't encourage her," Levi muttered.

"I don't think she needs a whole lot of encouragement, Levi."

Levi huffed, but didn't argue the point. Erwin was probably right.

 

-Eren-

Eren was having a difficult time ignoring a certain table near the front counter where one stormy man and his two (much more enthusiastic) friends sat. Levi was an interesting enigma to him, and even if he was never as good at puzzles as Armin, Eren still had a dogged kind of determination that usually led him to the truth of things. The group's appearance may have been unexpected and unfortunately timed, but in reality he was glad to see them again. Even Levi.

No, _especially_ Levi.

Eren was so distracted wondering about _that_ revelation that he overcharged a girl for the bowl she had painted and had to run her card through the machine two more times before he got it right.

"Eren, what the heck is the matter with you today?" A short brunette girl said from where she stood behind him. She had her hands on her hips. "You've been clumsy and distracted ever since I got back from my lunch break."

"I'm fine, Sasha," Eren said, sighing. "I'm just tired. How was your break anyway? Did you make a baked potato again?"

The girl's face lit up with a look of pure bliss. "Oh Eren you would not believe how tasty it was! I brought cheese and sour cream and Connie even surprised me with homemade bacon bits this morning , would you believe it?" Eren tuned her out almost immediately. When Sasha got started on food there was very little that could stop her.

He glanced to a nearby table, where Erwin and Hanji were chatting and painting their pieces. Erwin was slathering red paint on a mug, and Hanji was trying some kind of detailed pattern with a thin liner brush on a flower pot. Levi sat next to them with his arms crossed, not moving toward the plate Eren had seen Hanji pick out for him. His face was impassive, but Eren thought that the man was probably enjoying being there with his friends more than he let on, even if he wasn't participating.

Eren wondered what it would take to get the man to actually try painting. He didn't seem like the type to give in to something he didn't want to do. Would he respond more to a challenge, like Jean? Or to pleading? Eren could usually get Mikasa to change her mind if he pulled out the puppy eyes. Would either of those work on Levi?

"Eren? Eren!" Sasha pulled him out of his thoughts with a poke to his arm.

"Hmm? Yeah, what?" Eren said, turning. A herd of customers jostled around the front counter, with Sasha in the center like the eye of a hurricane. _How did I miss that?_ He was definitely slipping.

Eren sighed and got to work, sparing one last glance for a table not too far away before calling, "I'll help whoever's next!"

\---

Two hours later, Eren escaped from the latest crowd of customers to hang his apron up on a hook in the kiln room. "Hey, Marco." Eren said to the boy who followed him in, "You're off now, right?"

The boy grinned. "That's right! I've got the next two days off also!"

"Lucky," Eren said, "I've got closing shift tomorrow."

The two of them walked out the front of the studio together, waving to Sasha as they left. Marco turned to head to his car when they reached the sidewalk, but Eren stopped him. "Hey, I was going to go eat at the coffee shop with Armin, he should be off now too. Want to come?"

Eren and Armin had a tradition of meeting up for lunch at least once a week at the coffee shop where Armin worked. Sure, they lived together, but between work and school they didn't always see much of each other. And they both liked sitting together and spilling their stories over a hot cup of fresh coffee, especially during the rainy months. It was summer now, and they had even more free time to spend together since they weren't in class every day, but the tradition had stuck, sometimes expanding to include their other friends.

Eren hadn't spent a lot of time with Marco outside of work, so he was glad when his friend smiled brightly in response. "Yeah, I'd love to! Thanks Eren!

Armin was already sitting in their favorite corner with a drink when Eren and Marco walked in. Jean was at the counter, leaning on one hand. Eren grimaced- he and Jean were friends, sure, but they argued a lot and Eren was too tired from work to want to deal with him yet. "You go ahead Marco." Eren waved his friend toward the counter, where Jean had finally straightened and was looking at them, wide-eyed. "I'm going to say hi to Armin."

Eren wove through the tables to finally plop down next to Armin, laying his head down in his arms. He turned his head to the side to talk to the blonde, who was looking back with fond amusement. "Hey Armin. I brought Marco, hope that's okay."

"Of course, I'm happy to see him. But Eren, are you alright? You seem tired out."

Eren let out a huff of breath and frowned. "I'm fine. Just had an odd day I guess."

Armin hummed in acknowledgement and took another sip of his iced coffee. Before long Marco joined them at the table, holding a drink that seemed to be at least 50% whipped cream.

"What the hell is that, Marco?" Eren asked, sitting up to peer at the drink in his hand. "I thought you hated cavity-inducing coffee."

"I... wanted to try something new." Marco laughed nervously. His face seemed a little flushed.

"Huh. Well I'm going to get something too." Eren left his friends to talk and found his way to the front counter, where Jean definitely was not paying attention.

"Kirstein! Hey, horse-face!"

Jean finally turned to look at Eren, expression quickly going from annoyed to almost...embarrassed? As if Eren had caught him at something other than staring off into space. "What do you want?"

"Finally! I thought I was going to have to hop back there and make my own drink!" Eren said. Jean, who might normally have told him to "fuck off", or "shut up, Jeager", just grimaced.

"Are you going to order or not?"

"Okay, okay. I'll have an iced americano and one of those blueberry scones."

"Fine." He rang the order up, only messing up once, and took Eren's money without looking at him. Just as Eren turned to wait at one of the nearby tables, Jean reached out to grab his sleeve. "Wait! I, um. I have a question."

"Okay..." Eren said, drawing out the Y. "Shoot."

"Who's the guy you're with? The tall one. Not Armin. Obviously."

Eren rolled his eyes. "The 'tall one' is Marco. He's my coworker."

"So you two aren't.... Are you...." He seemed to gather his composure and finally spit out the question. "Is he your boyfriend?"

Eren laughed. "No. I'm not even sure he's gay, Jean. And I thought you weren't either?"

Jean huffed, "I'm not, idiot."

When Eren sat back down at the table he gave Marco an appraising look. He honestly hadn't thought of Marco that way, but the other boy _was_ attractive. He had tan skin, with a light dusting of freckles across his face, and dark, tousled hair. He was fit, too- Marco biked to work even more than Eren did. And in his short sleeved t-shit, it was clear that he had nice arms.

Though...Eren couldn't help but compare them to Levi's, with his shirt sleeves rolled up like they had been at Erwin's party. It was a shame they weren't visible today- Levi had kept his jacket on from the moment he had walked in to the moment he left. It had been torture, to know what beautiful, toned, muscular arms were hidden beneath that fabric. Eren had spent a lot of the day sneaking peeks at the older man's table, wondering if the jacket was ever going to come off and if Levi even knew what a work of art they were.

Of course, that meant Levi had caught him staring more than once. He had just raised a thin eyebrow and turned back to his friends, but Eren was sure he had secured the reputation of a horny stalker in Levi's eyes. Maybe Eren was over-thinking things. After all, he had seemed friendly enough when he and his friends left the studio.

_"Look, Eren! We finished!" Hanji gushed happily. "Well, Levi was no fun at all, but Erwin and I both painted, see?" Hanji set the two pieces down on the counter in front of Eren. Hanji's, a flower pot, was covered in interlocking swirls of color like vines. Erwin's was much simpler- solid red with the words "Mr. and Mr. Smith 2015" in blocky black writing._

_"They're great, Hanji!" Eren said, turning the pieces to see every side. "It's too bad you didn't paint something, Levi, I would have liked to see what you made."_

_The man just scoffed and said, "I don't paint." but after Eren rang up their purchase and waved goodbye, he turned to say: "Another time, brat." Eren wasn't sure if he meant that he would paint someday, or just that they would see each other again, but he decided it didn't matter, not really.  
_

"Eren, you've been quiet... Is something wrong?"

Eren looked up from where he was gazing at the wooden table. Armin and Marco were both looking at him, concerned. "Hm? Oh. No," He said. It occurred to him that he hadn't heard a single word of their conversation for the last ten minutes, at least. "I was just thinking."

If his friends noticed the dreamy smile on his face, they didn't say a word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are no zoos near Bellingham but sssshhhhh Levi doesn't know that! Hanji does, of course. She also knows how much he hates them. Hanji you sly girl, you.
> 
> Kudos and comments are my life! Don't be shy :)


	6. Suddenly everything changed, Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So my computer accidentally deleted some of this (or maybe I was just dumb and forgot to save it) and I had to rewrite a ton! In the end I think it's actually better because of that though. Maybe I should forget to save things more often.  
> Haha, jk. Not doing that.  
> Enjoy, dears.

-Eren-

"Come _ON_ , Eren! We'll be late for the show!" Sasha cried, though she was quickly distracted by her boyfriend, Connie, who had just run up to hug her from behind. The three of them were spending the weekend in Vancouver, BC to celebrate the beginning of summer and see some band that Sasha had been obsessing about for weeks now. 

Eren tuned out their giggles as he contemplated the sign for a shop across the street. "You go on ahead, I'll catch up," he said, "I need to pick something up for Mikasa."

There was no response from either of them, but Eren turned to slide between two cars and jog across the street as soon as it was clear- they would figure it out eventually. Besides, his errand should only take a few minutes. Maybe he would even be back before they realized he was gone. When he looked back across the street, Connie had just hoisted Sasha up to carry her on his back. She was squealing in delight as he ran in zig-zags down the sidewalk. Eren, smiling in amusement at his friends' antics, pushed into the store that had caught his eye. 

Instantly, the earthy and floral aroma of the dimly lit tea shop invaded his senses. The room was painted in deep greens and browns, and beautifully polished hardwood floors reflected light from hanging lamps. Near the front door where Eren stood, low tables displayed tea sets and various accessories. In the very back, a wall covered with tins and bags of tea was attended by a small woman with strawberry blonde hair cropped in a long bob. She wore a tan apron with the words "The Tea Legion" emblazoned on the front.

"Hello, Welcome to The Tea Legion!" She recited cheerfully, "My name's Petra. Can I help you find anything?" 

"Yes, actually," Eren said as he approached the counter, "I'm looking for some matcha for my sister. Do you have any in?"

Petra nodded. "We sure do! Is she familiar with matcha? It takes some unique preparation!" 

"Yeah, she’s pretty obsessed with it actually," Eren laughed. "Every time I visit she makes me drink it. Her favorite tea shop went out of business though, and she's been complaining lately how hard it is to find the good quality stuff."

"In that case..." The woman had been reaching for a tin on the shelf, but she looked thoughtfully at Eren and then said, "Wait here." She darted around the corner into what Eren assumed were the back rooms. He stared after her, bemused, but then turned to browse the displays. 

A few moments later, Eren was peering at an English teapot decorated with pale orange roses when an irritated voice wafted around the corner. Eren's eyes widened as a short man with raven-black hair appeared at the counter, Petra following closely behind. The two men locked eyes across the room.

"Eren?" the older man said with genuine surprise. 

"Levi... You work in a tea shop?"

Levi pulled himself up to his full height and glared at Eren. "I _own_ this tea shop." 

Eren just stared back, noting Levi's air of authority and the way the small redheaded woman hovered behind him. "Oh," he said finally.

"Levi," Petra said hesitantly, "This is the customer who wanted the matcha."

Levi's narrowed eyes swung to Petra and then back to Eren, considering. "There's no fucking way you drink matcha." Levi said bluntly.

"I don't! Well, not unless my sister makes me," Eren protested. "I was trying to buy it for her." 

Levi drummed his fingers against the countertop as he thought. Eren shifted his weight nervously under the man's gaze. Finally, Levi seemed to come to some conclusion, and beckoned sharply to Eren. "Come on," he said, and disappeared into the back again.

When Eren glanced at Petra for confirmation she just shrugged. "Back-stock is the second door on the right," she said. "That should be where he's headed." 

"Thanks." 

Eren dodged around the counter and into the back area, feeling more like an intruder than a guest. "Oi, brat! I haven't got all day!" a voice called from one of the rooms down the hallway. Eren grinned. _That's more like it._

The room Eren stepped into was slightly better lit than front of the store. Levi was rummaging through stacks of boxes and muttering to himself. "...didn't bother to label them, the shits..."

"What are you doing?" Eren asked curiously, stepping over to Levi. He had an unaccountable urge to place a hand on the man's shoulder, and nearly did so, hand stopping just an inch shy of Levi's white shirt. _Wait._ "Are you wearing my shirt?" He blurted out.

Levi stopped to look down at the shirt in question. One hand reached up to touch the material. "Yes, I.... It fits well." There was a strange thrumming electricity in the air between the two men. Levi had turned, just barely, so that Eren could see his face in profile. He watched as Levi's eyes slid from the shirt back to the boxes next to them, avoiding Eren's gaze. "We just got a shipment in," Levi said abruptly, "Of tea." Some of the tension dispersed, but it didn't quite dissipate. 

"Okay..."

"There should be some ceremony grade matcha in one of these, better than the shit out front." The man pulled a large box toward him and violently tore the tape off so that he could look inside. "Scouts Tea Leaves is the best out there, but the idiots never think to organize the boxes." He started pulling bags of tea out and reading the labels, grumbling as he went, "This is going to take forever."

Eren took his apartment key out of his pocket and used it to cut open a different box. Levi looked up at the noise but didn't say anything. Eren gave him a small smile and began to remove bags of tea, reading each unfamiliar label before placing them on the ground next to him. The two fell into a kind of companionable rhythm as they worked. 

"So why a tea shop?" Eren finally asked, giving Levi a sidelong glance as he sorted through the bags of tea.

Levi shrugged. "It sounded better than getting felt up in prison,” he said dryly. 

Eren rolled his eyes. He was starting to understand Levi's particular brand of humor. "C'mon, I'm just curious." He said. "It doesn't really seem like you. I mean... it does, now that I'm here." A frown creased Eren's brow as he tried to express just how _strange_ it was that Levi owned a tea shop. "It's just-"

"I'm a short, irritable, emotionally stunted military man with a potty-mouth?"

"Well...yes."

"Even fuckups can be passionate about something, kid. I fucking love tea." 

Levi had just opened his third box when Eren glanced up again. He was immediately taken in by the sight. The man had carefully rolled up the sleeves of Eren's white shirt, revealing those muscular arms that seemed out of place for a man who owned a tea shop. His hair, usually perfectly arranged, fell forward where it was longer near his face. Eren wanted to brush his fingers through it, but whether to smooth it back into place or muss it even further, he couldn't be sure. He pulled another bag out of the box without looking. Levi finally seemed to sense his gaze, and glanced up at the bag of tea Eren was holding.

"You found it?" the man asked.

Eren looked down, reading the gold lettering on the dark bag. _Matcha._ "I guess so," He murmured. So why did he feel so disappointed?

 

-Levi-

He rang up Eren's purchase himself, much to Petra's surprise. The woman was used to Levi handing off customers to her as soon as possible. He rarely even saw customers anymore, preferring to spend his time in the back room. Levi knew his strengths, and none of them included interacting with strangers. 

Eren wasn't a stranger though. Not that he was a friend either, at least not yet- so far they had only met accidentally. _Not yet_ , Levi mused. He wondered when he had started to think of their friendship as an eventuality. 

_A green-eyed figure stood in front of him in the last of the evening light, hands gripping his bicycle handles. "I enjoyed... getting to know you."_ Was it then? Or had it started even earlier than that, when Levi stood in a pottery studio and accepted his offer of a clean shirt? It didn't matter, he supposed. 

Levi punched a number into the cash register. It was a much lower number than it probably should have been. Petra would ask him about that, later. But it wasn't as if she could expect him to charge Eren full price- he was a college student, after all; he probably didn't understand how much money good tea cost. Besides, he had helped Levi unpack everything. It was only fair to give him a discount. 

Eren handed over a card and Levi swiped it, pausing to stare down at the name printed in raised silver letters. _Eren Jaeger._

"Shit." Eren swore. Levi looked up to see Eren thumbing through messages on his cell phone, worry etching lines between his eyes. 

"Hey," Levi said, "What’s wrong?"

Eren sighed. "I didn’t realize how late it got. I came here with two of my friends to see a show at the Commodore Ballroom. We were walking there when I saw this place and decided to stop in. I didn't think it would take an hour and a half to pick up tea..." he said sheepishly. Levi mentally cursed himself for not keeping track of the time. 

"Anyway," Eren continued, "The two of them weren't paying attention and thought I went ahead. They've been calling and texting me ever since they got to the Commodore and realized I wasn't there." 

Levi glanced up at the clock on his wall. "It's actually closing time here, I could drive you over."

Eren shook his head. "Even if I got there I couldn't get in. Sasha forgot she was holding on to my ticket, so now it's inside with her. They won't allow re-entry so there's no way to get it to me. I'll just have to go back to our hotel room."

"By yourself?"

"Yeah, it's no problem. Sasha was the one excited to see them, I can't make her miss it just for me. "

 _Sasha._ Levi wondered if he had heard the name before. _Who was she? Was she Eren's girlfriend?_ Levi tried to ignore the way his heart sank at the thought.

"What about your other friend?" Levi asked.

"Connie?" Eren laughed. "He and Sasha have been dating for years; they're basically inseparable. Where Sasha goes, Connie goes. There's no way he'll leave her behind to hang with me at the hotel." 

A wave of relief washed through Levi. "Come home with me," he blurted out. _Shit, that sounded bad._ "I mean, my apartment is just a few blocks away. I have movies and food, and you won't be alone in a strange city. You can even crash on my couch if you want."

"Okay." Eren said, with hardly any hesitation. "I'll just let Sasha and Connie know." He pulled his phone out again and Levi watched as he walked out the front to talk to one of his friends, leaving Levi, stunned, at the front counter.

Petra spoke from behind him. "Levi, did you just give that boy a 50% discount?" 

"Yes." It wasn't as if he could hide it.

"And then you invited him back to your place?"

He was quiet for a long time before answering, watching as Eren paced in front of the shop, cell phone pressed to one ear. "...yes."

Petra whistled appreciatively. 

Levi whipped around to give her his best glare. "If you say even a word to Hanji about this..."

Petra grinned, holding up her hands in defeat, "Don't worry boss, I won't tell her." She giggled. "She always finds out anyway!"

It was true. If Levi even spoke to Hanji on the phone, she would find a way to draw it all out of him. Well, he could hold out until tomorrow at least, or else Hanji would drive all the way to his apartment that night, just to show up with a video camera for "documentation". She was just that kind of woman. 

Eren came back into the studio as he finished his call, pushing the door open with his back. "-fine, Connie, I promise. I'll text you when I get there. Yeah, okay. Sure, see you then." He punched the end call button on his phone, and then looked over to grin at Levi. "Good to go," He said.

-Eren-

Once Petra had assured Levi enough times that she was able to close up shop without somehow burning the place down, Eren followed Levi out the front door and toward his apartment. The two men walked side by side, and with each accidental brush of their arms, Eren firmly suppressed the desire to touch Levi, to kiss him, to- anything really, as long as it wasn’t walking in silence. _Silence, at least, I can do something about_ , Eren decided. But nothing he could think of saying seemed interesting or clever enough, and before he knew it Levi was unlocking the apartment door.

Levi’s apartment was spotless. Eren followed the other man in, obediently removing his shoes at the door, and wandered open-mouthed into the living room. It was a small apartment. No- it was tiny. The living room that Eren stood in was the largest space, with its ceiling reaching up to the second story. To one side of the apartment, a narrow staircase led up to the next level, which Eren assumed to be the bedroom. Beneath the bedroom, and next to the door they had entered from, was a small kitchen where Levi lingered, watching Eren inspect his personal space. 

“This place is beautiful!” Eren said. It even had a _balcony_! 

“That’s because I actually clean my apartment, unlike you.” Levi stood with his arms crossed, as if he was annoyed by the praise. But Eren caught the slight uptick at the corners of his mouth and knew that the man was pleased, or at least humored by Eren’s excitement.

“We clean the apartment! You just caught it at a bad time.” 

Levi snorted (an implied _yeah right_ ) and changed the subject. “Have you eaten?”

“Not since lunch.” Eren grimaced. Sasha had planned on them stopping for a meal before the show, but that hadn’t happened and Eren was starting to feel hunger creeping into his stomach. 

Levi nodded and began to rummage through the kitchen. Eren watched as he pulled out a salmon fillet and an array of fresh vegetables and lined them up on the counter.  


“Here.” Levi said, shoving a cutting board and a very dangerous-looking knife into Eren’s hands. “Start with the potatoes. Don’t chop any fingers off.” Eren did as directed, wielding the chef’s knife warily, while Levi turned on the oven and began prepping the salmon. 

“It’s been a long time since I had salmon.” Eren said conversationally. “Armin and I don’t exactly cook much.”

“I make the best goddamn salmon in Vancouver.” Levi said. He said it as if it were an undisputed fact- as if all of Vancouver BC had come together one day to say that, yes, indeed; Levi made the best goddamn salmon in the city. Eren stopped chopping to smile across the counter at Levi, who frowned and said, “Cut those smaller.”

“Yes sir!” Eren said, mocking. Levi just rolled his eyes. Before long Eren had cut the potatoes, zucchini, and peppers to Levi’s satisfaction. The vegetables were poured into a pan, seasoned, and slid into the heated oven along with the salmon, which had been drizzled with some kind of marinade. 

Even uncooked, the smell of the food made Eren’s mouth water. Cooked, the aroma put Eren in raptures before he could even take a bite. “Levi, this is amazing!” He said, hovering around Levi as he pulled the food out of the oven. “Look at that salmon! It’s perfect!”

“Back up, brat, or I’ll end up burning you.” 

“Oh. Sorry.”

They took their food out into the summer evening and sat on the porch. It looked out over the small courtyard that the building was built around, so the two men could see that there were a few other people outside as well, their soft chatter floating around them. The light was finally fading, but it was still warm outside, and they settled comfortably at the small patio table. 

Eren dug in to the salmon as soon as he was seated, closing his eyes and letting out a hearty, appreciative moan as it fell apart on his tongue. “My god, Levi! You were right.” He opened his eyes to see Levi staring at him, fork hovering with a bite full of vegetables and salmon, eyes wide and pupils dilated, his lips slightly parted.

“Well?” Eren said. “Try it.”

Levi finally looked down to his fork, frowning, but took the bite. He grimaced. “Not my best.” 

“Well I, for one, would gladly put anything of yours in my mouth.” Levi dissolved into a coughing fit and Eren felt himself flush all the way to the tips of his ears as he realized what he had said. “I mean,” Eren stammered, “Well, I…um. I didn’t mean…yeah.”

Levi groaned. “Just shut up and eat, kid.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update: Just putting the finishing touches on chapter 8 and wooo boy, it's a doozy. You're going to love me and hate me all at once. I have to admit I'm looking forward to it.  
> I've also made some serious progress on another plot line I've been considering.... You'll hate me for that one too. Mostly hate. Sorry.


	7. Suddenly everything changed, Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here goes.

-Levi-

They finished the rest of their meal without incident, though a small crease appeared between Eren’s eyes. Levi itched to reach out and smooth it with his thumb, but he thought better of it. It was bad enough to have those thoughts about the kid without acting on them too. It was clear that Eren didn’t reciprocate any feelings for Levi- the earlier mishap and his resulting stumbling denial had been proof enough of that. 

They washed the dishes, Levi scrubbing, Eren drying, since there was no dishwasher in the apartment. Levi had to admit that Eren was a good dish partner- he was meticulous enough, and he was also tall enough to reach the top shelves without pulling out the footstool, as Levi would have had to do. 

They worked easily together, as if they had been washing dishes with each other for years- it left a strange ache in Levi’s chest. He thought again of Mike and Erwin, and how easy they were around each other. Would that ever be him? 

“I have some work to do tonight, for the shop,” Levi said, handing Eren the last plate. “You can use the TV if you want. I’ll pull out some blankets for your sorry ass in a bit.”

“Thanks, Levi.” Eren smiled. It was hesitant, still charged with the awkwardness that had pervaded earlier, but Levi was glad to see that it erased the crease between his brows. 

Levi set out his computer and paperwork and sat at one of the counter bar stools. Behind him, Eren rifled through his movie collection. The clatter of DVD cases was oddly comforting as he worked. 

“Levi,” Eren asked suddenly, laughter evident in his voice, “Why do you own every season of Gilmore Girls?” 

“Gilmore Girls is a fucking classic, Eren. Don’t be a dick about it.” 

“Hanji made you watch it, didn’t she?”

Levi sighed, put down his pen, and swiveled around to look at Eren. The other man was crouched by his movie cabinet, holding the first season in his hands. “Hanji made me watch it,” He admitted. “But it’s surprisingly good. The dialogue is excellent, and besides…” No, Levi, don’t say that. He clamped his mouth shut.

“Besides, what?”

 _Shit._ “Milo Ventimiglia is fucking hot.”

Eren laughed then, and it was _beautiful_. He laughed so hard that he had to sit all the way on the floor, head tilted back, delight rolling out of him so effortlessly and wholeheartedly that Levi couldn’t help but smile in return. 

“Hah. Wow.” Eren said, finally recovering. He glanced at Levi with a look that bordered on affection. Levi fidgeted in his seat. “We have to watch some.” Levi had to turn back around to avoid those bright eyes, which appeared green in the dim light of the apartment.

“Eren, I have work to do. I can’t stay up watching Rory and Jess trip over each other.” 

“Sure you can, Levi. Knowing you, you’re weeks ahead of schedule! And I’m only here for the night.” 

Levi frowned down at his paperwork. As much as he hated to admit it, Eren was right. The work in front of him didn’t need to be done for three weeks at least.

“Come on,” Eren said, taking Levi’s silence for agreement. “Where should we start?” 

Levi spared one last lingering look for his uncompleted paperwork. “Season three, episode seven,” he said begrudgingly.

“ _They Shoot Gilmores, Don’t They_?” Eren said, reading the episode title from the case. “Oh, it’s the dance marathon episode!”

“You’ve seen it?” 

Eren laughed again. “Mikasa.”

Mumbling something under his breath that sounded a little bit like “hypocritical brat”, Levi grabbed the case from Eren and slid the correct disc into the DVD player. He dropped onto the couch, propping one ankle on the other knee and slinging an arm over the back. Eren joined him, at first sitting carefully at the other end of the couch, but soon tucking his legs up on the cushions between them. 

“Luke is my favorite character.” Eren said, as the grouchy diner owner bantered with Lorelai Gilmore on screen. 

“Let me guess- because he and Lorelai are meant for each other?”

“No. I mean, yes- but that’s not why. He’s just- He puts on this act that he hates everyone and everything but in the end he’s a sweetheart, and he’s always there for Rory and Lorelai when they need him.” 

Levi hummed in agreement. He glanced over to Eren, who is absorbed again in the show. His eyes trace down the other man’s jaw, up to slightly parted lips, an angular nose, and to soft, disheveled, chocolate brown hair. Milo Ventimiglia paled in comparison. 

Levi pulled his eyes forcefully back to the screen, only to find that he had missed the theme song entirely. 

They watched two episodes. By the end Eren was fading fast. His head drooped finally to rest on the armrest of Levi’s couch, legs still curled nearly into a ball. Levi shut off the TV and padded softly to the linen closet, pulling out a knit blanket to throw over his sleeping form. 

After tucking him in, Levi stayed for a moment next to Eren. He brushed stands of dark hair away from the younger man’s face, and allowed two fingers to trace the path his eyes had wandered down earlier. Eren’s skin was soft. He didn’t move as Levi’s touch trailed down his cheek. _What I wouldn’t give_ … Levi wondered, refusing to finish even the unspoken thought.

Shaking his head at his own absurdity, Levi trudged up the stairs to his loft bedroom, though he stopped near the top for one last glance at the man asleep on his couch. 

In his room, Levi shed his clothes, hanging what could be worn again in his small closet, and discarding the rest into his laundry basket. His thoughts lingered back in the living room, where a certain bright-eyed boy lay sleeping. While pulling a towel from the cupboard he contemplated Eren’s laugh, when he stepped into the bathroom he was recalling the look of affection in the younger man’s eyes, and as he turned on the shower he remembered the groan Eren had uttered when he first tasted Levi’s salmon. 

By the time Levi had finished lathering his hair with shampoo, his cock was hard and dripping with more than just the shower water. 

Levi tried to ignore it, but as he rinsed out the shampoo and began to clean his body, he couldn’t avoid the way his erection ached even more with every idle thought about the man downstairs. 

He let his hands inch closer and closer to his cock without touching it, trailing little spirals on the skin of his thighs. A noise escaped Levi’s mouth that was as much a groan as it was a moan of pleasure as he finally moved to grasp his penis, hand still slick with soap. 

He massaged himself slowly at first, rubbing his thumb over the tip and along his length with each stroke. His other hand trailed up and down his chest, finding the grooves between his muscles. Arousal warmed his skin and his breath came in shallow gasps. 

Eyes hooded, an image of Eren came unbidden to mind once again; the brunette grinning at him with excitement as they sat down for dinner in golden light. With a sharp breath, Levi picked up his pace and leaned forward, his left hand coming up to press against the shower wall. 

His body shuddered as he continued to touch himself, not daring to think too closely about the man he was fantasizing about. In his mind the man was gentle and sure. His other hand would tangle in Levi’s hair or ghost down the sensitive places on his thighs. He would leave kisses and bite marks on Levi’s pale shoulder, would trace his collarbone with a skillful tongue. 

A searing heat pooled in Levi’s groin as he brought himself closer to the edge, his strokes becoming more erratic. A pair of green eyes flashed once more in his memory and with a cry Levi came, splattering onto the tiled shower wall before him. He continued to pull himself through the orgasm until he was spent, then pushed himself back into the stream of warm water. 

He stood there under the water for a long while as his heartbeat slowed and his breathing evened out once more. _Get a grip_ , Levi thought with a sigh, watching his cum drain away. _You’re thirty four years old for fuck’s sake. Jacking off to a twenty year old was a shitty idea._

He washed himself all over again, this time slowly, methodically. Once all traces of soap and cum were washed down the shower drain, Levi toweled off and slipped into an oversized shirt and pajama bottoms. 

Cursing silently, he shuffled down the staircase to retrieve his computer and paperwork, pausing once more to stand in front of Eren. The brunette had finally stretched out to take up the length of the couch with his legs, though his arms were still curled near his face. He snored gently into the cushions. 

“Sleep well, Eren,” Levi said regretfully into the quiet room, and retreated to his own bed, where he fell asleep after working on budgets and sales projections into the early morning.

 

-Eren-

Eren woke the next morning with a vague impression that he had dreamed of Lorelai demanding that he fix her broken shoe, despite all protests that he didn’t have anything to glue it with, and that Luke Danes had wished him goodnight. It was the rumbling of a coffeemaker that finally pulled Eren into the present. 

He opened eyes slowly. Rosy light from the window infused the entire apartment around him. Levi was facing away from Eren, leaning against the kitchen counter with his shoulders slumped. He was wearing a shirt a few sizes too large, and grey and red plaid pajama bottoms that dragged on the floor. Eren grinned at the sight. 

“What time is it?” he asked, pushing himself up to sit straight on the couch. A green blanket fell from his shoulders and pooled around his lap. 

“Just past six.” Levi said. He turned and gave Eren a faint smile, but it seemed to be forced; Eren noticed it didn’t reach all the way to his eyes. 

Eren yawned, stretching his arms up as he stood. “Oh, wow. Do you always get up this early?” 

“Yes.” The other man said simply. Behind him, the coffeemaker stopped gurgling, and Levi turned to pour two mugs full of the dark liquid. “Coffee’s ready.”

“Mmm, coffee,” Eren said, coming up behind Levi to grab one of the mugs. Levi pushed the sugar toward him and Eren gratefully poured a large helping into his mug. He looked curiously over to Levi, who was already sipping his own coffee. “Don’t you drink tea though?”

Levi shrugged. “Most days.”

“But not today.” Eren stated, questioning.

“The first day we met, you told me to wait in a coffee shop where the idiotic barista couldn’t pronounce the names of their tea. No way you’re a tea drinker.” 

“Ha!” barked Eren, “That was probably Jean. He just started there a month or so ago.” He took a generous sip of his coffee and immediately felt the warmth work its way through his body. “I’ve known him since freshman year. He’s kind of a dick but we have a lot of the same friends.” 

Eren chattered through two cups of coffee and a plate of scrambled eggs. By the end Levi seemed to be back to normal. _He must not be a morning person_ , Eren thought. 

Eren’s phone buzzed while Levi was upstairs getting changed for the day. “Connie and Sasha are here.” Eren called, reading the text. “They parked just down the street.””

Good.” Levi said as he descended the stairs from his bedroom. He was dressed casually in a pair of dark jeans that hugged his ass just so and a soft black tee shirt that left his muscular arms out for Eren to admire. Which he definitely was _not_ doing. _Dammit_. “Can you find them without my handholding?”

Eren snorted. “I’m not that much of an idiot.”

“Debatable,” Levi retorted mockingly. His lips curled just barely into a smirk as he joined Eren in the living room.

“Well.” Eren said, “I should probably go then.” The apartment was silent for a moment as they both let that statement sink in. Eren just wanted to stay and laze around the apartment with Levi, watching TV, sitting on the porch…

Finally, Levi strode past Eren to the kitchen, tore off the blank bottom of his shopping list, scribbled a few numbers down, and then handed the sheet to Eren. “Here,” He said. “In case you’re in Vancouver again.” 

Eren stared at the sheet in front of him for several seconds before registering that Levi had just handed him his _phone number_.

“Oh!” He said. “Um, let me just text you right now so you have mine too!” He did just that, punching in Levi’s number and a quick text:

 **[To Levi]:** _It’s Eren! :-)_

“Thanks again for letting me stay here,” he said, shoving the phone back in his pocket. “It was way better than waiting in the hotel alone. Besides, Connie snores.” Eren’s nose wrinkled up at the thought. 

Levi snorted in amusement. “So do you.”

“Well, maybe. But I don’t keep myself up into the early morning with my own snoring.”

Levi chuckled, actually _chuckled_ , and Eren was enraptured by the way it transformed his face. His narrowed eyes crinkled at the corners, his mouth opened in an easy smile, his shoulders relaxed. Each change was subtle, but added together it was almost as if he was a different person; a happier one. 

Eren wanted to kiss him.

 _Well, why the hell not_ , Eren thought, and leaned down to crush his lips against Levi’s. One hand rose to hold the other man’s cheek, fingers itching to delve into his dark hair. For a moment Eren was lost in the action, his heart thumping wildly. But- something was wrong. True, Levi’s lips were soft, his face warm and smooth in Eren’s hand. But his body was stiff, and though he wasn’t pushing Eren away, he wasn’t exactly responding with enthusiasm.

Eren pulled away, breaking the kiss before it had even truly begun. Levi was looking up at him with the most expressive face Eren had seen on him so far; with his eyes wide and mouth open in a slight “O”, Levi was the picture of shock.

“Oh, _FUCK_.” Eren wailed. He ran out the door without even saying goodbye.


	8. If you wanna be with me, Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Angsty Eren up ahead.

-Eren-

“Alight, time to stop moping,” Mikasa said, bursting open the door to Eren’s bedroom. “Reiner invited us all over for fireworks tonight and you’re going to go.”

“Mikasa?” Eren said, wearily pulling the bedcovers away from his face. “What are you doing here?” Showing up without warning was not her usual modus operandi. She was usually too obsessively worried about his safety to be capable of surprising him. 

“Armin called me.” She said, standing in the doorway with her hands on her hips. “He said you haven’t left your room for the past five days except to go to work and eat.” She grimaced at the state of his room. “Smells like it, too.”

Eren huffed. “That tattletale.” He pulled the covers back up and mumbled, “I don’t wanna go. I hate the Fourth.” Eren could hear her shuffling around his room, probably trying to tidy the disaster that it had recently become.

“Last year told me you wanted it to be Fourth of July every day.” 

“Well, I was sloshed.”

“Stop deflecting. You’ll come, Eren, and you’ll enjoy it like you always do.” Mikasa said. Her tone brooked no argument. 

In the kitchen, Armin was munching contentedly on a bowl of cereal and flipping through the Bellingham Herald. His long blonde hair was pulled into a shaggy half-bun, and both elbows were propped up on the counter where he sat. 

“Armin- I love you, man, but right now I don’t like you.” Eren said, sliding into the seat next to his best friend of fifteen years.

“Sorry,” Armin said sheepishly. “I should have realized she would drive all the way up here just to get you out of bed.” 

“Come on, Armin, you know how it is with Mikasa,” Eren lectured, “What Mikasa can do-“

“-Mikasa does!” the two of them recited in harmony. Mikasa scowled as she joined them in the kitchen. 

“You needed it though, Eren.” Armin said, pushing aside his newspaper to look at him face to face. “I’ve been worried about you.” 

“I’m fine.” Eren said, though his voice was quiet. Armin and Mikasa shared a meaningful look. 

“Eren,” Mikasa began, “We just want to help you... “

Eren scowled. “Leave it alone, Mikasa.”

“Oh, for goodness’ sake!” She cried, throwing up her hands. “What could be so terrible to put you in a mood like this?” She didn’t notice Armin’s warning glance.

“I’m a fucking idiot is what!” Eren said, with a burst of emotion. “A fucking _idiot_. Of course Levi wasn’t interested in me! He’s successful and put together and I’m just a stupid, messy, immature college student!” He slumped forward in his seat and laid his head on the countertop, groaning, “I shouldn’t have kissed him.” 

“Eren ran into his crush in Vancouver,” Armin translated, “and things didn’t go well.”

Mikasa was immediately on her guard. “What happened?” She demanded, “He didn’t hurt you, did he?”

“He just _stared_ at me!” Eren whined.

“Oh,” She said, leaning back in her seat with a huff. “Is that all?” 

“Yes that’s _all_ , Mikasa.” Eren snapped, “Get off my back for once!” 

Armin just groaned and put his head in his hands. 

\----

In general, Eren loved the Fourth of July. Reiner and Bert always hosted a party with all of their rugby teammates, and things tended to get pretty loud and rowdy. The main attraction was their porch, which looked out towards the bay and the annual fireworks display. It was also a great time to pick up guys. Something about firecrackers and cheap beer really got the heart racing.

Tonight though, the idea of bumping shoulders with a lot of sweaty, muscular men who’d had most of their brain cells knocked out of them didn’t appeal to Eren. There was only one man Eren wanted to see. _And he’s never going to talk to me again_. The thought left a bitter taste in his mouth.

The bus system didn’t run on Independence Day, so the three of them walked all the way to Reiner’s house on North Garden Street. The fastest path was through campus, and thankfully Armin kept up a steady stream of chatter about his summer classes the entire way.

“-and my government class is over there!” Armin said, pointing to a brick building. “We’ve been talking about the Czech Republic recently, it’s really fascinating. Eren, did I tell you Annie is in that class with me?”

“More than a few times,” he grumbled.

They arrived at Reiner’s house just as the sun inched down to rest upon the horizon. The sky was lit up with oranges and pinks and a tinge of soft purple. Jean was standing on the front porch, cigarette glowing faintly between his fingertips. He glowered as they walked up. 

Armin spoke first- he seemed genuinely happy to see the other man. “Jean! Good to see you outside of work for once!” he said, climbing the steps to join Jean on the porch. 

“Yeah, well, don’t get too used to it,” Jean said, flicking ashes over the railing with a scowl. “I’m leaving.” Eren resisted the urge to say “ _Good_ ,”- Jean, always irritating, became belligerent when drunk.

“What for?” Armin asked, curiously, “You’ll miss the fireworks.”

“Never liked them anyway,” he said. He took another long drag of his cigarette and turned away to rest his forearms on the wooden porch railing. With his empty hand he picked at flaking white paint and flicked it to the pavement below. 

“Well, we should go in.” Armin said when the silence had stretched too long. “I hope you change your mind, though. This is a great place to watch the show.”

Jean didn’t turn around, just muttered, “Yeah, yeah. I’ll think about it.” 

They pushed their way in, assaulted immediately by the pungent scent of weed, sweat, and alcohol. Mikasa wrinkled her nose in disgust. 

Eren trailed behind Armin and Mikasa as they wound through a narrow hallway of other college students. “It’s crowded this year,” Mikasa observed. It was indeed. The noise was grating on Eren’s ears. Loud music was blaring from speakers in the living room, and everyone else had to raise their voices in order to be heard over the pounding beat.

There were too many people to fit out on the porch for the fireworks show, but Eren guessed that in an hour many of them would be too drunk to care. He saw a few people he knew- Reiner’s booming laugher was audible from the porch, where he stood with Bert and Franz. At the end of the hallway, Mina chatted to a sullen Annie, who appeared to be drinking straight vodka. 

Eren also spotted Connie and Sasha sitting on a ragged leather couch in the living room and sharing a bag of chips between them. “You’re right Connie,” Sasha was saying. “The barbeque flavor is way better!” Connie nudged his girlfriend as soon as he saw the three of them wander in, and waved them over. 

“Eren!” Connie said, “How’re you doing?”

He shrugged. “All right.”

Connie and Sasha gave each other significant looks. Sometimes it seemed as though they could actually communicate telepathically. They were always chatting over each other, finishing each other’s sentences, and just generally making mischief. 

“Well,” Sasha said, “At least you’re talking again.” She popped another chip into her mouth.

“Talking?” Mikasa asked. There was a threatening undertone to her voice, daring them to even _try_ lying to her. Armin reached up and put a hand on her shoulder, as if to hold her back. 

“He didn’t say a single word during the drive home from Canada,” Connie said confidingly, seemingly unfazed by Mikasa’s reaction. 

Sasha vigorously nodded her head. “He spent the whole time staring out the window, looking like someone just shot his dog.” 

Eren frowned in thought. He honestly couldn’t remember the drive. He had been in a kind of haze, unable to process anything except the lingering taste of Levi’s lips and the heavy silence that had greeted him at the end of the kiss. When he pulled himself back to the present, Mikasa was giving him a searching look. 

“That’s…unlike you,” she said admitted. “I guess he must really mean something to you.”

Eren just looked away. Through the crowd, he could see a girl with ash blonde hair standing in the kitchen. She was pouring vodka into a glass of cranberry juice and gossiping with her friends. Behind them a couple 18 packs of Rainier sat on the kitchen table, unopened cans spilling out onto the wood. 

“I’m going to get a beer,” he announced, and left his friends staring after him. He pushed his way into the kitchen. The music was a little quieter here, and he could hear the blonde girl and her friends easily.

“I mean, its fine and all,” she said. Eren grabbed a can from the table and popped the tab. “It’s not like we were ever really together! I wasn’t going to marry him or anything.” Her voice was thick with derision. 

Eren took a long swig of his beer and grimaced. The blonde continued talking behind him. “I’m just saying, I deserve a little more respect, don’t you think?” He left as the other two girls began to nod in agreement. 

Rather than rejoin Mikasa and Armin, he wandered out to the back porch. Reiner, dressed in a pair of flag shorts and a hideous eagle tank top, was trying to convince Bertholt to shotgun a can of beer. Bertl, usually reserved, was hilarious when he was drunk so Eren didn’t hesitate to take Reiner’s side. 

“Come on, Bertl, it’ll be great! We’ll do it with you,” Eren said. 

“Speak for yourself, Eren,” Reiner said, rolling his eyes. “I’m drinking bourbon tonight like a true American.” 

Franz, who had moved away from the group to talk softly to his girlfriend, looked over and called to them, “Not all of us can down alcohol like a fucking tank, Reiner.” 

Eren laughed. Reiner was known for drinking everyone solidly under the table. “Besides, shotgunning is as American as it gets,” he added.

Bertholt nodded desperately. “You gotta do it too, R.”

“Oh fine,” he relented. “Franz, you’re part of this, get over here!”

The four of them all did it together, carefully passing around a house key to puncture mouth holes in each can. Eren, still not finished with his first beer, set it aside for later and grabbed a new one. They all lined up carefully along the side of the balcony, holding each beer into the warm summer air to avoid dripping on the porch. A few fireworks were being set off in the distance on the other side of the bay, casting flickering bursts of colored light on their faces. 

“Alright, you assholes,” Reiner called mockingly. “On three. One...two…three!”

With a _hiss_ , each of them popped the tabs and swung their cans up to suck the alcohol out, metallic taste of aluminum beneath their lips. Reiner threw his can to the ground first, and Eren finished his soon after. Franz, slow but steady, tossed his down with a flourish while Bertl was still leaning over the balcony’s edge, liquid dripping down the pale skin of his throat. 

The three of them laughed good-naturedly as Bertholt finished his can with a grimace. Reiner slapped him on the back in congratulations. “Good job, man.”

“Never again,” the tall boy replied with a burp, shaking beer from his fingers. 

Eren snickered and returned to his first beer. He decided to just chug it down, and went back inside in search of a third. Mikasa was standing with Annie in the kitchen, sipping on some kind of mixed drink. The both of them were much the same as Reiner; seemingly unaffected by alcohol no matter how much they drank. Eren, on the other hand, was already starting to feel pleasantly warm from drinking two cans of beer in quick succession. He grabbed another one anyway. 

Before he could open it, someone was shoving a shot glass full of amber liquid in front of his nose- _Oh. It’s that blonde girl from earlier_. She was dressed in a pair of high-waisted shorts and a low cut red shirt that was tied in a little knot at the bottom. If Eren had been interested in boobs, they would have been tempting. 

“Here,” she said. “You’re obviously gay. Drink with me- to a life without idiotic men!”

“Uh…obviously?”

“Don’t make me laugh.”

He took the small glass out of her hands. “Here’s to a life free of idiotic men!” The shot burned his throat on its way down. “Actually though,” he said, coughing, “there’s this guy-“

The girl rolled her eyes. “Oh my god, shut UP. I don’t want to hear about your boyfriend.” She walked away before Eren could say anything else.

Connie stood up on the coffee table to announce the time just as Eren wandered back out to the living room clutching his third can of beer. “It’s finally ten thirty, everybody!” Connie shouted. “Prepare for things to go boom!” With a loud “Whoop!” from Sasha, he jumped off of the table and the two of them ran out to the porch. 

Pushing through a crowd of rugby men that were suddenly focused on moving in the same direction, Eren stumbled outside just in time to see the first firework rocket into the sky. It exploded in a massive shower of red sparks that fell nearly to the water of the bay below. The crowd standing shoulder to shoulder on to the wooden porch all oohed and ahhhed in appreciation. 

Eren looked around with unfocused eyes, searching for someone he knew well enough to stand with. Reiner and Bertl were all the way on the other side of the porch, Sasha and Connie were too absorbed in each other to be any fun, and Mikasa and Annie had disappeared. Armin was nowhere to be found either. As he decided to suck it up and watch the show alone, he thought he saw a certain horse-faced asshole step on to the porch with someone else… _Is that Marco? Huh. Didn’t know they were friends._

He was about to join them when Armin suddenly squeezed out from between two very large and beefy rugby men. “Oh, Eren, thank god,” he said, “I’ve been looking all over for you! You’re okay, aren’t you? You just ran off!” The blonde boy was swaying slightly; he put a hand on Eren’s shoulder to steady himself. “Reiner gave me a shot of whiskey,” he explained earnestly.

“Ssshhhhhh. Arm’n.” Eren’s tongue felt heavy and thick. He took another gulp of his beer. It was almost gone already. “I’m watchin’ fireworks.” From where the two of them stood, they had a view of the water through the gap between two shoulders. 

As they watched, three fireworks were set off in quick succession. The first crackled with streaks of silvery-gold that branched as they fell, but it was interrupted with bursts of red and green as the other two exploded above it. 

_Is Levi watching these?_ He felt sure that somewhere in the city, the other man was standing between Hanji and Erwin as the fireworks burst overhead. Eren imagined the way they would light up his face with flashes of green and red and gold. 

“Armin,” He said suddenly, as another firework lit up the night sky, “I jus’ realized ‘m fucked.”

“Mhmm.”

When the fireworks display ended, Eren found the blonde girl again ( _“The name’s Hitch, asshole.”_ ) and they took two more shots together, the first to: “not being the idiot fer someb’dy else, y’know?” and the second to: “being too good for those assholes anyway.” Eren didn’t repeat that one. It was the other way around for him- Levi was perfect, inside and out. 

A while later he stood in the middle of the kitchen, swaying slightly under the influence of so much alcohol. The people seemed to spin around him. Maybe that was the whole room, actually. There was a beer in his hand. He peered at it, confused. _When did I get this?_ Eren couldn’t remember how many beers he had drank, or how many shots Hitch had shoved at him. _Was it three? Or four?_

Eren wished that Levi could be there. _He would know how many shots that was_ , Eren thought, rather irrationally. He pulled out his phone and thumbed through his messages until he reached Levi’s name. The other man hadn’t texted him or called him since their last meeting. There was only one message under the other man’s name- a sad, “ _It’s Eren! :-)_ ” in a little blue bubble. The smiley seemed to mock him now. _Fuck_. 

Without really thinking, Eren tapped out a message. He took a gulp from his beer, and then thought for a moment, looking out to the porch. He smiled and sent another. He pocketed his phone, took a swig of his beer, pulled his phone out once again and sent a third and final message. _That’ll do it_ , he thought hazily. He had to find Armin and tell him the good news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow this chapter was fun. I actually drew out diagrams of what was happening throughout this party- who's talking to who, where they are, how many alcohols has Eren consumed??, etc, etc. There's so much going on in the background!  
> Why is Jean being all moody? Is Reiner the most patriotic American ever? Who is Hitch so bothered over? Is Marco a real live angel? Where did Mikasa and Annie disappear to? What other chip flavor was barbecue better than??? WHO KNOWS  
> These questions might (maybe) get answered if I decide to go through with a parallel Jean/Marco AU later. Let me know what you think about any or all of these things.


	9. If you wanna be with me, Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you think Eren was angsty? HAHAHAHAHAHA. Say hello to Levi, folks. 
> 
> Also, do you know how hard it is to imitate drunk texting when you're sober? I had to turn my iPhone sideways and squint while typing to get ideas for these, because apparently I can text perfectly even with my eyes closed.

-Levi-

_On impulse, Levi wrote down his cell number and handed it to the boy, who happily tapped out a message to send in return. They stood in the living room, bantering, neither wanting to say goodbye._

_“At least I don’t keep myself up at night with my own snoring.” Eren had said. Levi laughed at that, finally letting go of the ache he had held in his heart since the night before. Levi felt like an awful, perverted old man, but Eren was perfect. Levi knew that he would do anything to help him, whether that meant saving him from Connie’s snoring, or just being there to listen when things got hard. It was a scary feeling._

_Levi had laughed, and then without warning Eren reached for him, one hand hot on his cheek, his lips meeting Levi’s in a rush of desire. And what did he do? He fucking panicked, goddammit. He could feel Eren’s lips moving against his own but was too stunned to react in kind. Too soon, Eren pulled away, confusion giving way to horror. With a loud “FUCK,” the younger man ran out the door, leaving Levi in the living room with bruised lips and an aching heart._

Levi stood stock-still in his living room until the last echo of Eren’s shout faded around him. With two fingers he traced the edge of his lips, letting the corners of his mouth curl up in a faint smile. _Did that really happen? Did Eren just kiss me?_

From the kitchen counter a _buzz_ rattled his charging phone against fake marble. He crossed the room to check it, surprised when his legs seemed unsteady.

Two words and one emoji were waiting for him when he swiped the screen open. “ _It’s Eren! :-)_ ” The smiley emoticon bought Eren’s face into Levi’s thoughts all over again. Bright blue-green eyes, tousled hair, smile that tugged at Levi’s heart… the thought of a face shouldn’t be so powerful. It shouldn’t send shivers down Levi’s spine and through shaky knees all the way down to the tips of his toes, but this one did. 

Really, the shaking through his entire body was getting ridiculous. Levi drew a deep breath in through his mouth and out of his nostrils. _Better_. He pulled a stool away from the counter and sat down, still staring at Eren’s message.

_It’s Eren! :-)_

He should think of something to say. Should tell Eren he misses him already, should tell him that the kiss left him breathless and spineless, ask him when he’s coming back to Vancouver, anything. There’s too much to say- Levi was bursting at the seams with all of it, in a way he never had before. 

He sat at the counter, typing and deleting message after message. None of them were good enough. “ _It’s Levi_ ” was just dumb and obvious. “ _Come back_ ” was too demanding. “ _Why did you leave?_ ” sounded desperate, and “ _I enjoyed the kiss_ ” just seemed…wrong. 

Stumped, Levi looked up from his phone, only to find his own reflection staring back at him from the dark glass door of the microwave. The sight jolted Levi out of his thoughts.

In the slightly reflective glass of the appliance- a housewarming gift from Erwin that he almost never used- Levi’s visage was shadowed and warped. The dark circles under his eyes, the result of very little sleep, were purple hollows. The flush that he could feel on his cheeks was invisible. His wide eyes seemed crazy rather than excited, like when Hanji got overeager about her science experiments. His hair was fluffy and untamed due to showering the night before, and further mussed by running anxious fingers through it while he drafted his unsent messages. He looked like a wild creature. 

Levi held his own gaze for far too long, suddenly seeing the entire morning through the warped glass of his microwave. 

_Fuck_ , Levi thought, dropping his cell phone as if it was too hot or filthy to handle. “Fuck,” He repeated aloud. _What is this? What the fuck am I doing?_ He frantically ran his hands through raven hair once again, mussing it even further. Another glance at his reflection only confirmed that the action made him seem even more feral. 

_Eren doesn’t want this_. The thought of those bright eyes filled his mind once again, but this time the sight was accompanied by waves of anxiety and self-loathing. _What the fuck am I thinking? I’m a fucking pervert. He ran away, he doesn’t want anything to do with me._

Levi shoved his phone farther away with a sound of disgust, then pushed himself violently out of his chair and paced into the living room. His legs were still unsteady, but this time as the result of anger broiling up out of his chest. 

“Fuck!” the man said once again. “Get yourself together, Levi. He doesn’t want this. He doesn’t want it.” He didn’t dare define what _this_ was. It didn’t matter. Eren didn’t want it. 

_None of it matters_ , Levi told himself firmly. _We have no reason to see each other again anyway_. He did his best to ignore the way his heart dropped at the thought. Eren couldn’t be interested in him, after all. Levi was old, boring, _settled_ , in the worst sense of the word. 

Eren was interesting. He had life and adventures ahead of him, unlike Levi. The kid was young, full of vitality and vivacity. He didn’t deserve Levi holding him back, whether he wanted it or not. And of course he didn’t. 

Another glance at the microwave reminded Levi that he deeded to be at work in fifteen minutes. The blinking green numbers of its clock were laughing at him. 

“Fuck.” He said again. _I’m not even dressed yet_. 

\---

Levi opened the shop ten minutes late and managed to snap at two customers before Petra arrived for her shift. He didn’t even greet her- just retreated to his office and dove into paperwork, relying on numbers to take his mind off of the self-destructive thoughts that had been running through his mind ever since he came face-to-face with his microwave. It didn’t work. 

It didn’t work that day, or the next, or the day after that, and by the end of the third day, Petra was at the end of her rope.

“That’s it, Levi!” She finally shouted, throwing up her hands in exasperation. “I’m done dealing with you and this mood you’re in. It’s gotten way out of hand.” She leveled her sharpest, most angry-mother type glare at him. “I’m calling Hanji.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” Levi hissed back. “I’ll fire you.”

Petra laughed in disbelief. “You’ll hire me back as soon as that woman knocks sense into you. You’d go out of business in a month if you lost me.”

Levi knew she was right, so he chose not to respond, relying on his most intimidating scowl to change her mind. It doesn’t work. Petra had been immune to his glares for a while now. _I should fire her just for that_. 

\---

When a knock echoed through his apartment the next evening, he opened the door without thinking. Erwin and Hanji were standing in the apartment hallway. They were holding two bottles of wine. Each.

Levi shut the door in their faces. 

“Come on, Leeevi!!!” Hanji’s voice called through the wooden door. “Open up!” Levi stood staring at the closed door for a moment, paced into the kitchen, and then back again. She whined his name a few more times before falling silent. There was a muffled conversation on the other side of the door- Hanji’s voice overlaid with Erwin’s calmer tones. 

A moment later, there were a couple raps on his door- Erwin this time. “Levi, please open the door. Petra called Hanji. She said you’ve been moody all week, and you’re taking it out on her.” Levi scowled. Damn Petra. _Why haven’t I fired her yet?_ “Levi, you don’t have to tell us anything, just let us come in. You know Hanji will just sit out here all night otherwise.” Erwin fell silent then, and Levi could sense him waiting for a response.

When he opened the door this time Erwin was still standing in front of him, but Hanji was slumped on the floor, four bottles of wine arranged around her. “Fine,” Levi said, and he walked into the living room, leaving the door open behind him. 

Levi made his way to the couch, and sat in the same place he had sat a few days before, when he and Eren had watched Gilmore Girls together. The other end of the couch was a gaping hole in his heart. 

“Levi?”

He looked up to see a glass of red wine in front of him, Hanji holding it out like a peace offering. He took it without a word. Hanji sat down beside him, right were Eren’s legs should have been. Levi resisted the urge to glare at her just for that. He took a gulp of his wine instead. 

“Levi…” She said hesitantly. “What happened? What’s gotten you so tied up in knots?” 

Levi ignored the question and stared into his glass of wine. It was a beautiful garnet red. Fading light from the window divided the liquid into glimmering prisms. Beside him, Hanji seemed to accept that she wouldn’t be getting any answers yet. She leaned back into the couch and took a sip of her own wine.

“Let’s watch a movie.” He said abruptly.

“Oh!” Hanji’s eyes lit up with excitement. “Erwin and I brought a ton to choose from! There’s this one I’ve been dying to see…” Levi stopped listening to her except to grunt his approval for her choice of movie. He would have agreed with any choice at this point- he only suggested it to take their focus off of him. Erwin and Hanji probably both knew that this was his intention, but they also knew not to push him to talk until he was ready. 

Erwin put in the movie and joined them, piling some pillows and a blanket onto the floor so that he would be able to lean up against the couch on Levi’s other side. Levi’s couch wasn’t too small- they could probably fit all three of them just fine if they wanted to- but everyone was more comfortable with Erwin on the floor. They settled in as if they had done it a million times before. _They haven’t though_ , he realized. Levi had been absent lately- too wrapped up in the shop and simulated loneliness to realize how much the both of them meant to him. 

Hanji’s pick was some action movie about robots, or monsters. Levi wasn’t sure which. Maybe it was both. He couldn’t seem to pay attention. His thoughts kept returning to a few days ago, when Eren had leaned down and kissed him. 

Levi would have loved to redo that moment, this time to grasp the situation soon enough to respond to the kiss. If he had a redo, he would put his hands around Eren’s slim waist, pulling him flush with his own body. This time around, he would trace his thumbs along the gap between Eren’s rumpled shirt and the jeans that hung perfectly at the younger man’s hip bones. 

That smooth caress would drive both of them crazy. Eren’s hands would dive into Levi’s hair, the pads of his fingers ruffling his undercut, his blunt nails scratching at his skull. Levi knew he would moan then. His hand would explore under Eren’s shirt while their kiss became more heated, palms running up and down the younger man’s back and sides. Maybe Eren would pull on his hair even more forcefully then, or gently nibble at his lip-

 _No!_ Levi forced himself out of the fantasy, jolting his thoughts back to the movie. _It’s never going to happen, you idiot. Eren isn’t interested in you. It was all just some sick joke._

Onscreen, one of the robots was fighting a huge slimy monster. His eyes drifted away again, moving to stare at each of his friends in turn. Erwin, sitting on the floor to Levi’s left, seemed relaxed and casual, but his eyes were focused on the television. Levi could tell by the set of his jaw and a crease between the man’s bushy eyebrows that he was concentrating hard- probably analyzing strategies used in the fight. On Levi’s other side, Hanji was entirely and unabashedly engrossed by the movie, leaning forward with arms around her knees. Occasionally she let out a strangled gasp as the two creatures crashed together.

 _Eren would probably do the same_ , Levi thought involuntarily. The boy had been a chatty TV companion the other night, at least until he fell asleep. _He should be here, he would like this movie_. Levi felt an ache grow in his chest again. It was an ache he was becoming very familiar with.

Levi spent the rest of the movie forcing his thoughts to stay in the safe zone, far away from Eren. He was only moderately successful. 

When the credits rolled and Levi didn’t move, Hanji put in a second movie. This time she didn’t ask his opinion. He was nursing his fourth glass of wine, and if it was meant to loosen his tongue it wasn’t working yet. He had spoken only to ask for more wine. 

This time the movie was the first of the recent Star Trek series. He knew it instantly- he had seen it enough times, after all. Over the past few years it had become one of his favorites as he found himself returning to it time after time. He liked to watch it when he was sick or upset, and let the familiar words and scene soothe him. He sent a tentative smile Hanji’s way, and she grinned in response. He settled in to watch this movie more closely than the last. 

About halfway through, Levi finally started to realize that something was wrong. The movie wasn’t soothing him the way it should. In fact, it was making things worse. Every close shot of Chris Pine’s aqua blue eyes deepened the scowl lines on his face. Even Erwin was beginning to give him anxious looks. It was the kiss that really did it though- Spock and Uhura, standing in the bright white light of the elevator, so like his kitchen on that morning. 

_Eren, leaning down to him, one hand caressing his cheek.... Their lips meeting in a chaste kiss, the buttery taste of eggs still lingering on Eren’s lips…._

…and Eren running away from Levi, door swinging shut behind him. 

Levi’s phone buzzed impatiently in his pocket, jolting him out of his spiraling thoughts about the bright-eyed man. He pulled it out, swiping a finger across the screen impatiently to read the text. 

It was from Eren. Levi’s breath caught and his heart thumped wildly in his chest. It was from Eren!

The text, however, was nothing Levi could have anticipated. 

**[From Eren]** : _Hwy jus twain say sor y about before I didn’t me and to make you uncomeforerae ur jus slike sob hot I cdon’t hemp it_

Levi frowned. Eren was obviously drunk; he could barely decipher the text. _Eren was…sorry? _His phone vibrated as another text arrived. He opened it.__

 **[From Eren]** : _The firework a reminders me of you_

“Fireworks?” Levi mumbled in confusion. Then, suddenly, a thought occurred to him; he nudged Erwin with his foot and asked- “What day is it?”

Erwin looked at him curiously. “Levi, it’s the Fourth of July. Well, the 5th, now.”

“Don’t be a dick about it Erwin, I’m Canadian now. I don’t have to keep track of that bullshit.” Levi said waving a hand dismissively. “Anyway, what the fuck are you doing here on the Fourth? Shouldn’t the two of you be setting shit on fire right now?” 

Erwin opened his mouth to answer, but Levi’s phone buzzed in his hand once again.

 **[From Eren]** : _I hope you goat to wansee ch them too_

Despite the terrible spelling, the texts were…sweet. The last two were easy to decipher- The firework’s reminded him of Levi, and Eren hoped that he got to watch them. The first one though- Levi read it again. 

_Hwy jus twain say sor y about before I didn’t me and to make you uncomeforerae ur jus slike sob hot I cdon’t hemp it_

Levi frowned as he translated Eren’s drunk texting. _Hey, just wanted to say sorry about before I didn’t mean to make you… was that uncomfortable? Uncomfortable, then._

The next part was more difficult. _You’re jus.. just. I cdon’t hemp it. Hemp, hemp… Help! You’re just like so hot I couldn’t help it? Oh. Ohhhh._

_Holyfuckingshit._

“Levi? What is it?”

Levi realized his mouth was hanging open as he looked up to meet his friends’ concerned stares. He shut it quickly.

“It’s…” His voice was raspy, his mouth too dry. “It’s Eren.”


	10. We’ll just have to wait and see

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is everything resolved now that Levi has Eren's drunk messages? No. Of course not. That would just be too fucking easy. This is the chapter in which Levi is a stubborn idiot and I want to knock him over the head with my computer.

-Levi-

“Eren?” Hanji screeched, “You’re texting Eren?!” Erwin looked up at Levi appraisingly, but didn’t say anything.

Levi looked back at his phone, as if to confirm that the messages were still there. They were. “He texted me…” 

Hanji was salivating with eagerness. “Let us see! Can we see? Levi!” She pleaded, holding out her hands to him. 

Levi could only stare down at his phone. His arms felt like overcooked noodles. He didn’t trust himself to move them. He nodded faintly and Hanji scrambled over to grab the iPhone from his fingers. The screen had gone black, but Hanji swiped it open and punched in his password like she did it every day. Levi just gazed blankly at her; there were too many emotions running through his body to make sense of any of them, let alone berate her for the breach of privacy. 

“Well?” Erwin prompted, when Hanji erupted into giggles. 

“Here, just-“ She handed the phone off to Erwin, body still shaking with laughter. 

He read them aloud carefully, a crease forming between his thick eyebrows. “..ur jus slike sob hot I cdon’t hemp it…” He looked up at Levi. “What is this? What couldn’t he…hemp?”

Levi groaned and scrubbed his face with one hand. The two of them continued to watch him expectantly. 

“Eren came in to the shop a few days ago.” Levi finally admitted. Erwin’s eyebrows rose. Hanji squealed. “On accident,” Levi clarified. “And then he stayed the night here.”

“He _stayed the night!?_ ” Hanji gasped, reaching past Levi to grab Erwin’s bicep. “Erwin. Did you hear that too? Am I dreaming? Is this a dream?” 

“Shut up, shitty glasses!” Levi finally growled, “It wasn’t like that.”

“Oh.”

Erwin carefully peeled her fingers away from his arm and focused back on Levi. “Tell us,” he said.

Levi shifted nervously in his seat on the couch. “I just offered him a fucking place to sleep, okay? He lost his ticket to some show and-“

“No, Levi.” Erwin’s voice cut through Levi’s explanation. He fell silent. Erwin leveled his most piercing gaze at Levi. “Tell us.” It was a command, a flashback to their military days when Erwin had been his superior officer. Levi had forgotten how _intense_ Erwin could be when he wanted to. _Damn him_.

Levi looked away, out to the porch. There weren’t any fireworks visible, but the calm night was comforting in a way. Behind him, he felt Hanji shift on the couch as she paused the movie. The room seemed suddenly too quiet. 

“We had a really good time.” He said. He took a deep breath and spit out the next three words like ripping off a Band-Aid. “He kissed me.” Hanji squealed with happiness, but he didn’t look at her. 

“And then?” Erwin prompted.

“And then he ran the fuck away!” Levi replied harshly, a little too loud. He turned to direct a glare at the other man. “It was all just some shitty joke, he isn’t actually interested!” 

He didn’t realize until he had already spoken that his outburst would only confirm that he wanted Eren to be interested. If he wasn’t, this conversation would be very different. He could imagine it – he would be laughing with Erwin and Hanji that some brat had _dared_ to kiss him, and had left with his tail between his legs. But no – for whatever reason, Levi _wanted_ Eren. 

“Levi,” Hanji said, “Would he send you those texts if he wasn’t interested?”

Levi’s eyes snapped up to meet Hanji’s. She was smiling in a way that he wasn’t used to seeing from her- it wasn’t her manic smile or her evil grin. It was full and bright and beaming and hopeful. Levi was almost ready to give in to that contagious hope, but he shook his head. It couldn’t be true. 

“No, Hanji. He’s just drunk.” 

“Drunk words are sober thoughts,” She recited in response.

“Hanji’s right.” Erwin said. He was still holding Levi’s phone, and he looked down at it fondly as he continued. “I didn’t even know Mike was gay until we got drunk one night and he tried to shove his hand down my pants.” 

Hanji’s brows furrowed together at the comment. “You told me he confessed.” She said, accusingly.

Erwin’s hearty chuckle filled the room. “Oh, he confessed! Just not until after I threw a punch at him.”

“I will never understand you two!” Hanji moaned, flopping back onto the couch. 

Erwin turned and handed the phone back to Levi, still open to the text messages. “Listen, Levi – he states directly that he finds you attractive, and I’m sure it goes even deeper than that. You have a chance, if you want it.”

“A chance…” Levi murmured. He twisted wasn’t the phone in his hands. _If I want it_. Levi didn’t have to think for long to recognize that he did. There wasn’t anything he wanted more, in fact. But wanting something didn’t make it right. 

“I can’t.” He said, setting his phone down on the coffee table with a solemn thud. “I’m thirty-four fucking years old, Erwin. He’s just a college student. He can’t even drink legally yet. It’s impossible.”

Erwin sighed in defeat. “Just…consider it, Levi.”

“I have.” Levi said softly. He gave his phone a lingering look before turning to Hanji. She seemed just as concerned as Erwin did. “Start the movie again.”

The three of them watched the rest of the movie in heavy silence. Levi could feel his friends’ eyes on him, but he didn’t call them out for it. He sat deliberately very still, as if by steadying his limbs he could somehow calm the hurricane of thoughts tumbling through his brain. 

When the movie finally ended, Levi helped Hanji and Erwin get settled with blankets and pillows. Hanji stretched out on the couch, and Erwin was thankfully content to nestle in his blankets on the floor. Levi retreated upstairs to his bedroom, took a quick military shower, and slid between the sheets of his bed. 

He lay there for a long time, staring up at the ceiling and willing himself to sleep. There was a dark stain in the corner of the room that he hadn’t been able to bleach off yet. It looked a bit like Australia. “I’m perfectly fine,” he told it, but not without wondering first if Eren had ever been to Australia, or would ever want to go. _Eren, Eren, Eren_. That’s all his thoughts were, these days. 

Levi flipped restlessly onto his side, away from Australia. He stared at his nightstand instead. There was a simple black lamp, some of his Tea Legion paperwork was hanging over the edge, and his phone charger was wound into a precise loop on top of the pile. Levi realized suddenly that if his charger was still wound up, that meant his phone was missing. 

“Tch. It must still be downstairs.” Levi sighed and turned back toward the ceiling. He would be fine without it.

But… would he? Leaving it downstairs meant that it was at Hanji’s mercy. And though Levi trusted Hanji with many things, his privacy was not one of them. She knew his password, apparently. She might try to text Eren back without his permission. It wouldn’t be the first time she had done something like that. He would have to retrieve it. 

Levi slid out of his bed and emerged cautiously onto the staircase that led downstairs. He could hear Hanji and Erwin whispering to one another, though he couldn’t make out the words.

Erwin must have heard his shuffling steps because the blonde called out, “Levi?” as he descended toward them. Levi just grunted in response. The two of them fell silent as he made his way to them. 

When he reached the living room he asked, “Have you seen my phone?” 

“On the table, sweetie.” Hanji replied. Levi glared at her. She only called him pet names when she was planning something. But there it was, right where he left it. 

Back between his favorite sheets, Levi plugged in his phone and tried to ignore it. He stared at the Australia-shaped stain for a while, then at a moth fluttering in the far corner. It must have come in from his deck entrance. When it flew out downstairs, Levi turned to stare at his nightstand once more. 

There was his phone, staring accusingly back at him. 

Perhaps Erwin was right, and this was a chance he shouldn’t pass up. Perhaps he was making things harder than they needed to be. He reached over and flipped the phone gently to rest on its side, so that the screen faced him. He navigated to the messages from Eren and read them over and over again until his eyes finally shut from exhaustion. 

When he woke up early the next morning, he was still clutching the phone as if his life depended on it. 

 

-Eren-

The light filtering through his blinds woke Eren, who covered his face with an arm and a loud groan. The sun hurt his eyes. Come to think of it, everything hurt. His head was pounding, his stomach roiling, and his tongue fuzzy and thick. There was even a bright spot of pain on his forehead… Eren prodded at it carefully with his eyes closed. It was definitely a scrape there, and probably a bruise as well. 

_Sheesh, what happened last night_? Eren thought as he moaned in pain once again. “I feel like shit,” he grumbled.

“Well you drank like you were trying to keep up with Reiner,” a voice commented clearly from the bed beside him. 

Eren startled, sitting up and opening his eyes rapidly, grimacing as the movement made his stomach protest even more. Next to him, an Asian girl with inky black hair flipped nonchalantly through one of his porn magazines. She was leaning against the wooden headboard from where she sat, fully dressed, on top of his sheets. A red scarf was wound around her neck.

“Oh,” Eren said with a sigh. “Mikasa. It’s just you.” 

“What, you thought I was some girl you brought home? Please.” She teased, waving the magazine in front of his face. “Both I and this gay porn would have stopped you.” 

“You never know.” He said sullenly. “And put that away, it’s private.”

Mikasa shrugged and slid the magazine back between the mattress and the headboard, then turned to look at him. “How much do you remember?”

He scrunched up his nose as he thought. “I remember taking shots with Hitch. And dancing, at some point.” He laughed. “Did Reiner really stand on the table and sing Yankee Doodle Dandy?”

Mikasa smirked.

“Oh so that’s real, then! I figured it was a dream.” Eren thought some more, twisting a corner of his blanket around a finger. “What else. I remember… Oh. Oh my god.” His face went white. “Where’s my phone? Fuck. Mikasa, help me find my phone.” He stumbled frantically out of bed, cursing, and began to dig through the clutter in his room. 

“It’s in your jeans. On the chair.” Mikasa said, without getting up. “It was ringing earlier.”

“What? Oh shit. Oh no oh no oh no.” He dug the phone out of his jeans pocket with trembling fingers and swiped it open to look, expecting to see an annoyed message from Levi. There wasn’t one. 

Confused, Eren shoved his jeans onto the floor and sat down. He glanced through the long list of notifications that had piled up since the night before. There were a few snapchats, which he ignored, and a ton of likes on an Instagram picture he didn’t remember posting. There was also a missed call and voicemail from an unknown number. That was probably just from the university; he’d listen to it later. He navigated anxiously to his messages. The roiling in his gut now was despair as much as it was from the alcohol. There they were- three messages to Levi. Little blue bubbles, floating off to ruin every chance he had. “Fucking hell,” He cursed, putting one hand over his face. “He’s never going to talk to me now.”

Mikasa gracefully slid off of his bed and approached the chair where Eren sat. He felt her cool lips press lightly in the center of his forehead. “Take a shower and eat something,” she said. “You’ll feel better.” 

“Okay,” he said. “Thanks Mika.” 

“Love you, Eren,” she said fondly, walking to the door of his room. She paused there with the door half open and looked back at him. “If this guy has any sense, he’ll love you too.” 

Eren felt the corners of his mouth turn up at that, but he only nodded. Mikasa left him to his thoughts and he stared for a while at the messages. When they started to swirl in front of his eyes, he sighed and got up to take a shower. 

Half an hour later, Eren was digging in to a fresh plate of scrambled eggs, water from his wet hair dripping down his back. 

“Jeez, Eren, slow down,” Armin said from beside him. “You’re going to puke if you keep eating like that.” 

“Eh, I’m fine now.” Eren waved off Armin’s concern. “Oh, hey – do you know how I got this scrape on my face?” He pointed at it with the blunt end of his fork.

Armin snorted. He was drinking a cup of black coffee and had the textbook from one of his summer classes open on the table. “You fell.” He said, grinning. “And then you blamed the whole thing on me, even though I wasn’t anywhere near you when it happened.” 

“Ah, shit. Sorry. I don’t remember any of that.”

“I figured. You were pretty far gone. You kept talking about how you were going to fix everything with Levi and live happily ever after.”

“Yeah.” Eren grimaced. “I doubt that’s going to happen.”

Mikasa chose that moment to emerge from the kitchen with a sandwich in one hand and her travel bag in the other. “I have to get back to Seattle tonight,” she told them, throwing one strap from the bag over her shoulder. “Take care of him, Armin?”

He nodded. “Of course.” 

“And Eren, stop giving him so much trouble all the time,” she said. “He does have other things to do.” 

“I know, I know, Mikasa. Jeez.” Eren rolled his eyes at his adopted sister but let her hug him anyway. She gave Armin a hug too and then left for the bus stop, giving them one last wave before she stepped out of the house. 

The two boys sat quietly while Eren finished eating and Armin read up on the history of Ukraine’s government. Eren was dwelling on the texts he had sent Levi, rolling each message around in his mind and trying to decide what to do about them. He was coming up blank. As far as he could tell, he’d ruined everything for good. 

His despair must have shown on his face because Armin sighed and turned to face him after a few minutes. “Eren, your mood is making it difficult to concentrate,” he said. “Is this about Levi again?”

“Sorry.” He put down his fork. He’d stopped eating already anyway. “Yeah, it is.” He didn’t say any more and Armin didn’t ask, just watched as Eren got up and put his plate in the sink. Eren smiled half-heartedly at his best friend, though it looked more like a grimace. “I’m going back to sleep,” he said.

Armin looked concerned, but he nodded. Eren shuffled back to his room, purposely avoiding looking at the desk where his phone sat. He flopped down on his mattress. It was strange how quickly things could go to shit, Eren realized. Just a few days ago he had sat with Levi in the other man’s apartment, joking about Gilmore Girls and Connie’s snoring, and then Eren had gone and ruined everything. 

The harsh sound of his phone’s ring tone broke into Eren’s thoughts. He groaned but climbed out of bed and picked up his phone. It looked like the same number that had left a message this morning, which he still hadn’t listened to. If it was from the university they were being unusually persistent, which meant it was probably someone demanding money. Eren’s thumb hovered over the red button that would end the call. Mikasa would kill him if they were late with a payment though… Eren sighed and accepted the call, bringing the phone to his ear. 

“Hello?”

A happy squeal of excitement came through of the line. “Eren!”

“…Hanji?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmmm.... what is Hanji up to?!?!?
> 
> True story: One time when I was really drunk I fell down on a steep hill and blamed it on my best friend. He wasn't even in the same city - I was talking to him on the phone! I woke up the next morning with a scrape on my face and no memory of any of it.
> 
> Okay, so I have a [tumblr](http://elegance-of-a-mountain.tumblr.com/), and that shit is really confusing. How do I tumble? I'm too old for this. But actually, I have a grand total of 0 followers rn and need some guidance and love in the world of tumblr so, like, follow me?  
> I did manage to figure out how to track tags, so that's happening now- I'm tracking #t3fieas and #these things take forever (I especially am slow), so if you wanna send me love on tumblr, that's how i'll see it. :)


	11. I mean I really think you like me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, sorry this last chapter has taken so long to write! I’m usually so fast with updates! I actually just moved across the country, so that’s a big reason why. Also, endings are hard. I wasn’t even sure for a while that this was the ending, but Hanji lays great plans, you know? She led the way.

-Levi-

“I know you don’t want to drive down here again but Levi, darling, I’m worried about you! Come spend a day with just me, please?” Hanji’s voice crackled through the speaker on Levi’s phone as he scraped his scrambled egg onto a plate. The phone was resting on the countertop just to the side of the stove so that he could cook and pay only minimal attention while she yammered on. This, though, caught his attention.

“Hanji, I’ve driven to Bellingham two times in the last month!” That wasn’t quite accurate, but with Hanji it was always best to over-exaggerate. 

“Yes?” She said, slowly. She clearly didn’t understand. 

Levi picked the phone up off the counter and held it to his ear. “Yes, and, I’m not a fucking millionaire Hanji! Do you realize how expensive gas is right now?”

“But Levi!! I miss you!” She whined, her voice making Levi wince. He rolled his eyes. 

“You saw me only a week ago.” 

“That doesn’t mean I can’t miss you!”

Levi sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Fine. I’ll drive down again. But –,” He cut off her excited squealing. “ _But_ , you’re paying for lunch. And dinner.”

“Yes, yes, okay! Don’t worry sweetie, I’ll take care of everything!” Then she hung up, the phone connection severed so abruptly that Levi had to check the screen to be sure she was gone. 

It wasn’t until he was on the road south that weekend that Levi realized Hanji had called him both darling and sweetie in one conversation. She had to be planning something. He was fucked.

Hanji insisted on having lunch at a new pizza place in Bellingham’s historic district. It was only just down the road from the pottery studio where Eren worked, which Levi did his best not to think about. If he had wanted anything to happen with the student, _which I don’t_ , he said resolutely to himself, the chance was long gone. 

They were seated at a table on the second-story balcony, where the two of them could enjoy the warm sunlight and the breeze coming in from the bay. A waiter came to take their order – salad and wine for Levi, pizza and a beer for Hanji – and they settled back to chat while they waited.

“I really missed you,” Hanji said, glancing down at her watch. Levi rolled his eyes at her.

“Hanji, stop repeating yourself. That’s the third fucking time.” Hanji had seemed unusually preoccupied ever since he arrived in Bellingham. There had to be something she wasn’t telling him. He had the nagging feeling she was distracted by whatever plan she had set in motion. He shouldn’t have come.

“What? Oh. Yes. But it’s true!” 

Levi snorted in disbelief. “If I walked out the door right now you wouldn’t notice I was gone until the check arrived.”

“No!” Hanji cried, suddenly alert. “You can’t leave!”

Levi just crossed his arms and glared across the table at her. If he was going to leave Petra alone at the shop for an entire day, it had better be worth it. He could be doing inventory right now! Or cleaning!

Hanji deflated a little under his glare. “Sorry Levi.”

The waiter returned with their food then, and Levi broke his glare to nod at the man. The waiter hurried away as soon as the food was in front of them, perhaps sensing Levi’s mood. 

From then on Hanji tried harder to focus on their conversation, but she still checked her watch every ten minutes, becoming more and more agitated as their meal progressed. If Levi drank his wine slower just to watch her squirm… well. He would be justified. 

They emerged from the front of the restaurant after their meal and Levi automatically turned to walk to his car, pulling his keys out from his jacket. Hanji stopped him.

“Let’s go for a walk!” She pulled at his sleeve, in the opposite direction from his car. Levi resisted. He wasn’t particularly interested in wandering through the busy commercial neighborhood. There were too many people with their brats and their pets and their shitty germs roving about. 

“Come _on_ , Levi! There’s a park this way!” She tugged on his sleeve again, and Levi gradually relented. A park sounded alright. There would be fresh air there, and space away from the people crowding the sidewalks. He let himself be dragged through an alley and a grassy square, and eventually onto a gravel path that wound through bushes of ripening blackberry plants.

The dust from the gravel path floated around them. Levi coughed. “Hanji, this park better be fucking incredible.”

“Oh, don’t worry, dear,” Hanji said, “Boulevard Park is just wonderful. You’ll be so surprised.”

“I don’t need to be surprised,” Levi growled in response. “I just need to get out of this shitty dust.”

Hanji didn’t respond. She just tugged him along as the path changed from gravel to pavement. The pavement then changed to a boardwalk that jutted out into the bay and curved along the shore. Levi finally relaxed again as the salty air cleared the dust from his clothes. 

She was right. This place was beautiful. Not as beautiful as the seawall in Vancouver, where a trail wound along a wall at the water’s edge of Stanley Park, but Levi had always found that park too crowded, except in the early hours of the morning. Here, the wooden boardwalk was peppered with people but not overrun with them. A small group of musicians played to the side of one of the fishing docks, filling the air with their music. 

Levi would have stood and listened to them play for a while, but Hanji was on a mission. She led him past the musicians without a pause, and on down the boardwalk, chattering brightly about nothing in particular.

“Ooh, Levi look at that puppy! I should get a puppy, don’t you think? I’ve always wanted a German Shepherd. They’re so expressive!” 

“So get a puppy.”

She waved her hands in denial. “Oh, no, I’d better not. I just don’t have time!”

Levi sighed. “Then don’t get a puppy, Hanji, fuck.”

“But I want one so badly!”

Levi, exasperated, just shook his head and walked in silence beside Hanji, who began to list the pros and cons of owning a pet. The boardwalk passed a small cove where some children played in the rocky shallows, then rose up to meet the land again, where they passed through a grove of evergreen trees. 

Ahead of them, a coffee shop was tucked into the landscape; all wood and rock as if it had been shaped from the very ground that it rested on. Hanji paused in front of it, so suddenly that Levi nearly crashed in to her. 

“I need to use the ladies room.” She said abruptly. “I might buy a coffee too.”

“Fine,” Levi said, stepping toward the door of the building. She caught his arm.

“No, why don’t you keep walking,” she suggested, pointing toward the path, which wound around the front of the coffee shop. “I’ll catch up.” 

Levi huffed but let her steer him toward the path again. He could hardly blame her if she wanted privacy, even though the timing seemed strange. He wandered slowly past the coffee shop, not wanting to get too far ahead. He could just find a nice bench to sit on and watch the waves while he waited for her. 

As Levi rounded the corner of the building, the first thing he noticed was that there was indeed a bench out front of it, facing the water. The next was that it was occupied. Then, and only then, did he realize that the occupant was none other than Eren Jaeger, who was turning around to glance at him. 

“Fuck,” He said, halting in the middle of the sidewalk. Eren stood up slowly from his seat on the bench. Levi just stared, his mind racing too quickly to settle on an action. 

He wanted to run. This was too much. He should go back to his quiet, comfortable home in Vancouver BC and never think of any of this again. Not Hanji, not Eren, and certainly not Eren’s mesmerizing turquoise eyes. Of course, if he ran, Hanji would probably be around to stop him. All of her strange behavior was starting to add up, settling into once clear picture. She had set this up. 

So he couldn’t run, but was frozen by the idea of moving forward. He was in sheer panic mode, actually. 

Finally (or maybe it was no time at all, Levi couldn’t tell) Eren stepped forward, seeming to realize that any progress would have to be initiated by him. Levi didn’t move – _couldn’t_ move – as Eren cautiously approached him, coming to a stop just out of arm’s reach. 

“Hey, Levi.” He said, and Levi let out a garbled response that could have been ‘hey’ or could have been ‘Eren’, and even Levi wasn’t sure which. 

“I, uh, I wanted to say sorry for, you know, the texts?” Eren said nervously, reaching up to hold the back of his neck. “I thought I’d really fucked everything up. First the kiss, I mean, doing it that way was a mistake, you obviously weren’t okay with it-“ 

Levi opened his mouth to respond- object maybe? But nothing came out. Eren forged ahead, oblivious to Levi’s internal struggle.

“And then of course I got really drunk and thought I could fix it all if I just talked to you, but that clearly backfired, I mean, I could barely decipher those texts and I was the one who _wrote_ them.” 

Eren was waving his hands in passionate self-mockery. Levi was caught by the motion of those tan hands, trying to remind himself for the millionth time that week that Eren was not to be pursued, that Levi couldn’t reach out and grab those beautiful fingers, and that Eren certainly did not want to be kissed again. The first one had been a mistake, after all. 

“But then Hanji called me – “

“Hanji.” Levi said with a bit of a growl, and that time it was clear enough that both of them heard it. 

“Yeah,” Eren said. He looked down and shifted his feet a little. It was endearing. “Anyway, she volunteered to set all this up so I could actually apologize in person. So I guess this is me apologizing.” Eren chuckled nervously and looked away.

“I don’t usually do that. Drunk texting, I mean,” he continued, “but I was pretty far gone that night. Honestly I only barely remember doing it. I should have just talked to you when I was sober, but every time I looked at my phone I got this sinking feeling in my gut, you know?” Eren turned back to look at Levi, his turquoise eyes pleading him to forget everything that had happened and just move on. Levi could only acquiesce. 

“It’s fine, Eren,” Levi said softly. “You don’t have to explain anything. We can still be friends.”

“That’s not what I-“

“You have my number, you’re still welcome to find me if you’re ever in Vancouver.”

Eren had a shocked look on his face, like he was amazed that Levi would forgive him so easily. Levi swallowed and looked away. Eren didn’t have to know that Levi still dreamed of that kiss, or, rather, of a kiss that Levi would be able to respond to. 

“Damn it Levi!” Eren’s voice cut through Levi’s self-pity. He was…upset? “You’re missing the point! Jesus Christ, Hanji told me you were oblivious but I didn’t think…” He ran an irritated hand through his hair, making a few strands stand on end. “Look, I’m not here because I want to be your _friend_!” 

Levi narrowed his eyes, about to tell him to shove it, if that was how he felt, but Eren shook his head. “Fuck, that’s not what I meant either.” He took a deep breath, looked Levi straight in the eyes, and took a step forward. Levi had to tilt his head up to keep eye contact with him. 

“Levi, I really like you.” He paused to run a hand through his hair again. “I want to _date_ you.”

If Levi had been shocked when Eren kissed him, it was nothing compared to this. “I…can’t.” He choked out, finally. “It’s not possible.”

“Why the hell not?”

“Because look at you! Fuck, Eren, You’re beautiful, and young, and starry-eyed, and I’m a grumpy thirty-four year old shop owner who yelled at you the first time we met because I’m a clean freak and an asshole!”

Eren’s eyes widened. “You’re thirty-four?”

“That’s the only point that stuck?”

“Well, yeah. I already knew the rest of it.” 

“Shit, Eren, I just can’t –“

Eren interrupted him, “Is this just because you think you’re not good enough for me or something?”

“What?”

“You’re wrong.” Levi could tell that Eren was verging on genuine anger. “If you think you’re somehow a terrible person for me, you’re wrong. You make me feel like the best part of myself when I’m around you. I like your shitty sense of humor and your tea obsession, and that you’re secretly a Gilmore Girls fan. I like that you know how to cook and that you run your own business. I like seeing you smile, when you actually mean it. I want to be the person who can make you smile like that. So don’t you dare think you’re going to corrupt me or lead me astray or something, because that’s bullshit.”

“I’m not –“ Levi started, but Eren interrupted him again.

“And if this is about the age gap, then so what? I already knew you were older than me, I just didn’t know the number. Knowing it now doesn’t change any of the things I feel about you.” Eren’s anger finally dissipated and he spoke his next words much softer. “I’m serious about this, Levi. I really am.”

Levi broke his gaze away to study the water of Bellingham Bay behind Eren. A few gentle waves were lapping up against the rocks below the path they stood on, and seagulls wheeled above them in lazy circles. Levi remembered Erwin’s words ( _you have a chance, if you want it_ ) and the way that Levi’s heart had pounded and his legs shook after that first kiss in his kitchen. One hand rose to touch his lips. He looked back to Eren, who was standing just two feet away and waiting for Levi to come to some conclusion. 

“You really mean all of that.” Levi said. It was a statement, but Eren responded anyway.

“Yeah.”

_It’s only a first kiss if you have a second one_ , Levi thought recklessly, and he stepped forward, reaching out for Eren as he did so. Eren, acting on instinct, seemed almost to anticipate the action. He moved his hands to wrap around Levi’s smaller frame as his head bent down to meet Levi’s. Their lips collided, and all Levi could think was that it was electric. It was every half-formed fantasy molded into one perfect moment. He didn’t care that they were out in public or that Hanji was probably watching from somewhere. All he knew was the sensation of Eren’s lips moving gently, passionately, against his own. When they finally broke apart Eren’s face was flushed and Levi’s heart was racing. 

“So, ah…” Eren gave Levi a crooked smile and flushed even brighter red. “Do you want to go to dinner with me?”

“I only just ate lunch,” Levi replied. Eren’s face immediately fell. Levi reached out and grabbed his hand, smiling as he continued, “but I’d go anywhere with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That’s all for now, folks! Thank you for all of the love and support! I feel like my writing skills have improved so much over the past few months, and it’s all because of the encouraging response I got from you all.
> 
> I have some other material I might want to explore with these two, which originally was going to be part of this fic, but I decided it’s better as a separate one. It will probably be a lot heavier, and I didn’t want to drag this one down with that.  
> In the meanwhile there are a few smaller projects I’m going to work on. I already posted a short drabble about Mike and Erwin that takes place in this AU, so if you want to hear about that “hand down the pants = confession” incident mentioned in chapter 10, you can read it [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4639311). :)
> 
> Again, my [Tumblr](http://elegance-of-a-mountain.tumblr.com/) for you. It’s my personal blog, so not just SNK trash, but I do post about my writing struggles/progress over there too!


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